George Wallace: As a guest on one of those new and improved, squeaky clean, "you won't catch ho's and cheatin' dogs on my show" episodes of Oprah Winfrey, stand-up comic extraordinaire George Wallace regaled the audience with "ugly momma" jokes and traded favorites with fellow comics on the panel. (Best joke heard on the program: "Your momma's so ugly, she used Secret and it told on her.") It's typical of TV, feature-film, and live-performance veteran Wallace that he can keep people in stitches with a bit of recycled juvenilia. There's no Carrot Top-style prop shtick for this 1995 winner of the American Comedy Award for Best Male Stand-up; with Wallace, it's all in the timing. He performs with Jetta Jones at 8 p.m. at the Dallas Convention Center. For ticket information call 373-8000.
1996 SolstiCelebration: In last week's "Street Beat," Observer music editor Matt Weitz covered the troubles experienced by the organizers of an annual summer solstice celebration known as "SolstiCelebration." Seems that a religion writer for The Dallas Morning News titled an otherwise well-meaning article about the drum and dance festival "Pagan's progress," prompting a drearily predictable response from the upright fundamentalists who infest our fair city. In the interest of full disclosure, the Observer Calendar begs forgiveness from SolstiCelebration organizers; seems the knuckle-headed writer who rules this space also referred to last year's festivities as "pagan rituals," contributing to the brouhaha. For the record, the 1996 SolstiCelebration features no cannibalism, public nudity, group sex, animal sacrifices, or anything else traditionally considered "pagan." (There will be a "sacred drum and dance service" Sunday morning.) It's just a family-friendly recognition of summer's arrival that features cool people hanging out. We still love the word "pagan," though. Events happen all weekend beginning June 21 at 7 p.m. at White Rock Lake in and around the Bath House Cultural Center, 521 E. Lawther. It's free, but bring your own musical instruments, refreshments, etc. Call 823-DRUM.
Healing the Hate: It's an ugly image many thought had faded with the '50s and '60s: an African-American church, reduced to charred timbers and ashes by racists. No one thought that sleepy Greenville, Texas--or anywhere--would again see the smoky shadow of Jim Crow cast so blatantly. With copycat arsons springing up now across the South, it's more important than ever to make a stand against the church burnings that have brought so much pain and suffering--and so many questions--to not only the residents of Greenville, where the first recent arsons occurred, but to the rest of us. Rob Pira and Evryman, his alternative Dallas band, have set up an afternoon and evening of music at the CopperTank Brewing Company, the proceeds from which will go directly towards the rebuilding of the torched Greenville churches. On the roster will be surf faves the Nitrons, rockin' blues stalwarts Cold Blue Steel, Robert Ealey, Evryman, Judy Hill's punky Psalm 69, and a host of others not yet confirmed. The benefit starts at 3 p.m. at the Coppertank at 2600 Main in Deep Ellum. The suggested donation is $10. For more information call 744-2739.
Eileen Fulton: Since the days of radio serials, the so-called "soap opera" has supplied millions of Americans with a much-needed daily dose of sex, treachery, intrigue, murder, infidelity, and other fun stuff. In the process, our prison system is kept free of those individuals who might become wanton felons if they couldn't find a regular vicarious outlet for their illicit passions. Veteran actress Eileen Fulton is one of the grande dames of the genre, a woman who has seen more personality changes in 36 years than a dozen psychotic wards. That's how long Fulton has portrayed Lisa Miller Hughes Eldridge Shea Colman McColl Mitchell Grimaldi on As The World Turns, vamping on men and tossing them aside like orange rinds in an era when you couldn't even say the word "pregnant" (much less "slut") on TV. Fulton signs copies of her show-biz tell-all, As My World Still Turns, a refreshingly self-deprecating look at her roller-coaster career. She appears to chat with fans and sign the book at 2 p.m. at Borders Books & Music, 1601 Preston Rd. in Plano. It's free. Call 713-9857.
A Place Called Timothy: Matthew Zrebski and Joseph Fisher, managers and cofounders of the Southern Methodist University-based Youth Could Know Theatre Company, have subverted a sacred theatrical tradition for the sake of a little attention. Monday is a "lights-out" night for every other theatrical company but Youth Could Know, a troupe of whippersnapper writer-actor-directors who (mostly) attend the theater department of SMU's Meadows School of the Arts. The company fills the void by offering the world premiere of a drama by Zrebski as its first entry in the '96 summer season. Press material for A Place Called Timothy warns that the play is "sometimes political," a nice touch in an era where on-campus displays of opinion are crushed as often as beer cans. Otherwise, it's the story of a messed-up family, its equally messed-up relationships, and a serial killer on the loose. Performances happen June 24-30 at 8 p.m. in Basement Theatre, B-450, Meadows School of the Arts, on the campus of SMU. It's free, but donations are encouraged. Call 361-7847.