Within a few weeks or so, all the arrangements will be made, so we don't want to go into too much detail here, but we will give you the basic gist of the plan: Trading the Dallas Mavericks. Not just Shawn Bradley, whose only function in the NBA seems to be starring in referee training videos about flagrant use of the elbows. Or Dirk Nowitski, the last in a long line of tall, white, crappy foreigners who are like catnip to the Mavs come draft time. Or basically everyone else on the team except for poor Michael Finley, who could probably win as many games as the Mavericks have this year if he were the only man on the team. No, we're going to trade the whole team to whatever city wants 'em. It will be the new franchise fee for any prospective expansion team, a ready-made batch of losers guaranteed to keep you in the cellar for the next decade or so. But we're not going to trade Don Nelson with the team. We've got something special planned for Nellie. We don't want to tip our hand, but we will say this much: Watch Reservoir Dogs very closely. See the Mavs lose another one on Tuesday when this week's lucky bastards, the Phoenix Suns, come to Reunion Arena. The game starts at 7:30 p.m. Call (214) 373-8000 for tickets. Final score: Phoenix 102, Dallas 90. Place your bets accordingly.
The MAC continues to hype this year's forthcoming Dallas Video Festival with a screening, as part of its Wednesday Night Film and Video Series, of one of the films from last year's festival. You can help decide which one by logging on to the festival Web site, www.videofest.org, and voting. The screenings happen every Wednesday this month and run in conjunction with The MAC's latest exhibit, Wired for Living, a preview of selections from this year's festival combined with donations from various galleries and museums around the area. The screening happens at 8 p.m. at The MAC, 3120 McKinney. $3-$5. Call (214) 953-1