The Turd Twister (turdtwister.com): As featured on So Graham Norton, this cheap ($9.95) starter kit helps you pass the time by shaping your poo like Christmas cookies.
North Texas Exotic Car Rental (exoticcarrentaloftexas.com): Daily prices start at $299 for a Porsche Boxster and go up to $1,495 for a Ferrari 360 Modena. Hourly rates, too. Hummers available.
Peter Petrie Egg Separator (stupid.com): Billed as ďthe most unappetizing kitchen tool ever,Ē this is a great gift ($12.99) for the idiot in your family. Or your friends with poor taste.
Mavs Man Appearance Package (dallasmavericks.com): Why just be annoyed at the Dallas Mavericks mascot at the games? You can pay up to $1,200 to have him figuratively kick you in the junk anytime!
Sky King Tricycle (restorationhardware.com): What spoiled brat doesnít need his or her own overpriced hunk of retro-cool? At only $199, you can thumb your nose at the poor in style.
Knurled Recipe Cocktail Shaker (restorationhardware.com): There are few better gifts than drinkiní gifts ($49). And this tells you how to make the drinks. With its knurls. Thatís why itís knurled.
Ceramic Smoking Baby (mcphee.com): Does this really need explanation? Itís ceramic. Itís a baby. Itís $4.95. And it smokes.
Semenex (semenex.com): The Web site says Semenex ($13.95 to $49.95) ďis an all-natural, patented powder drink for men that safely and effectively sweetens semen as it is produced in the male.Ē What about that doesnít scream, ďChristmas?Ē