Depress Tour

I coulda sworn I was there when they turned on the TV

At night, awards handed out by TCA over dinner, provided by celebrity chef Rocco DiSpirito; kitchen catches fire, food inedible. Consider making reality TV series out of fiasco; decide it's not worth the effort. Awards handed out early because organizers fear critics will lose interest after ABC debuts its schedules. The Daily Show with Jon Stewartreceives most of evening's accolades for, among other things, Program of the Year and Outstanding Achievement in News and Information. Stewart accepts award for latter; asks audience of voters, "What the fuck is wrong with you people?" Nod in silent, sanctimonious agreement.

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