By Amy McCarthy
By Scott Reitz
By Scott Reitz
By Lauren Drewes Daniels
By Alice Laussade
By City of Ate
The answer lies in the stunning work of Asch, Watts believes. In the 1950s Asch conducted a series of experiments in which he presented subjects with sets of vertical lines. Two of the lines were of the same length, while the other lines were clearly misfits. The subjects were asked to identify which pair of lines were the same. The twist in this seemingly pointless probe was that all the subjects except one were instructed to give the same bogus answer. Astoundingly, Asch discovered, one-third of the unwitting subjects against clear evidence and their own eyes went along with the crowd of false observers, offering choices they would never make on their own. Such is the power of peer pressure, which Watts believes triggered the Kerry cascade.
My mind wasn't on Asch when I bellied up to the circular bar at Elephant Bar Restaurant. Indeed, I had never heard of the fellow. Instead, I was wondering how I was going to survive this "safari through exotic destinations to find 'elephant size' portions of fresh culinary delights." But it wasn't long before I found myself in the middle of an Asch experiment.
It didn't happen right away. First I had to digest the atmosphere over a glass of listless cabernet before sanity was recovered and I ordered a listless lager. (Personal reminder: Never order wine in a restaurant that has brass elephant trunks for door handles.) There was a lot to digest: giraffes in the vestibule; metal elephant heads in the bar as big as...well...elephant heads; walls covered with bamboo; a dining nook loaded with safari trunks. I turned my attention to a contraption on the bar counter: a white metal rack holding large test tubes. It's called an "Exacto Pour," and the bartender explains it's used for practice runs before each shift. One shudders to imagine the potential for disaster if the rum pours were off in the "elephant rampage" cocktail.
Our banquette was covered in jungle print. The servers were prompt, focused and cheerful. "Well-trained," I muttered. Heads nodded. Our appetizers arrived shortly after we ordered them. This could signal one of two things: a well-oiled kitchen, or well-oiled ingredients. I was suspicious. "Immaculate," says one of my companions. "This system is impeccable." I didn't realize it then, but I was getting my first whiff of Asch.
Wok-seared pan-Asian chicken lettuce wraps arrived without incident. But I'm suspicious of lettuce wraps. In the annals of appetizer lore, lettuce wraps are like the lone house with a vaulted entryway in a suburban tract of cookie-cutter homes--the tiny dash of distinction that persuades us that we've retained our individuality amidst a storm of fabricated monotony. Iceberg lettuce, the anchor of the modern wrap, once was the Ernest Borgnine of cuisine. Borgnine appeared in virtually every movie made between 1960 and the early 1980s, and iceberg lettuce had a role in virtually every menu up through the same time period. The lettuce wedge swamped with blue cheese, a staple in steak houses, is just a wink at Ernest-ness. Lettuce wraps are nothing more than an attempt to turn Ernest Borgnine into Kevin Bacon, who has worked in every movie since the end of Borgnine's run.
Here, three cupped, crisp leaves beg to be stuffed with heaps of chicken ground into hamburger-size grains and mixed with chestnuts, cashews and flakes of toasted coconut. Load them in your cup, throw in a couple of gasket-thin marinated cucumber slices, dredge it though some mango salsa and...so what?
Then there's calamari, which floods menus of every caliber with the iceberg lettuce tenacity of yore, mostly with disastrous results. Here it is sliced into strips, flecked with sesame seeds and set off with a rémoulade that is supposed to be a soy-ginger bath if I'm reading the menu correctly.
"Delicious," says one of my dining companions; "Absolutely scrumptious," blurts another. "Enchanting," says a third.
What's going on here? Did I slip on an X-File as I passed the giraffes? Why was I utterly bored while everyone else was on the brink of speaking in tongues?
I swallowed as the entrees arrived. Fish tacos, supple corn tortilla pockets loosely cupping strips of dry tasteless fish, chopped tomato and shreds of jack and cheddar cheese in tomatillo-cilantro cream, were cold with ingredients that didn't coalesce into anything. "Awesome," says my companion. "These are the best fish tacos I've had in a long time."
If there is one dish you want dirty and aggressive, it's jambalaya. Elephant's Cajun jam was loaded with tomatoes and celery with bits of langostino, soapy shrimp, chicken and slices of andouille sausage. "I like it all," says my companion subject. "And it was $11.50, so I like it even more."