By Jim Schutze
By Rachel Watts
By Lauren Drewes Daniels
By Anna Merlan
By Lee Escobedo
By Eric Nicholson
From there, she has only fragmented memories. At the dorm, Meghan didn't want to wake her roommate, who had to get up at 3 a.m., so they went to Havard's room. "I figured I could lie down on his sofa," Meghan says. She sat down but couldn't get her shoes off.
Then, as if in a dream, Meghan says, she realized that Havard was on top of her, having sex with her. She didn't want to have intercourse, she says, but she could do little about it. "It was like being paralyzed."
When Rachel returned to the dorm around 2:30 a.m., she ran into her friend John, who asked, "Where's Meghan?" Told she was with Havard, John insisted: "Rachel, you need to go get her out of Doug's room." He later told police he'd learned just that week that Havard had access to GHB, and "he didn't trust [Havard] with women."
With 18-year-old John backing her up, Rachel pounded on Havard's door, but he didn't answer. "I got louder and more persistent," Rachel says. Havard, looking sleepy and surprised, finally opened the door, wearing jeans. Rachel saw Meghan sitting on a bed, wearing only one of Havard's T-shirts and on the verge of tears.
"She was out of it," says Rachel, who had to help Meghan down from the bed and walk her back to her room.
The first person to suggest Meghan might have been drugged was a doctor at the SMU medical clinic. Meghan had awakened with bruises on her wrists, arms and leg. The previous night seemed surreal.
"I just felt something was wrong," Meghan says. She and Rachel remembered how weird Havard had been about who got which Jell-O shots.
Havard had appeared at her door the next day with her clothes, necklace and shoes and asked, "Is everything OK between us?"
"I said, 'No, it's not,'" Meghan says. "I made it clear he didn't need to be around." That day Meghan sent a friend to give the silk-screening materials back to Havard.
Though Havard had assured her he used a condom, Meghan went to the campus clinic the Monday after the incident to get the "morning after" pill. After taking it, Meghan described the events and her symptoms to the physician. "Did it occur to you that you might have been drugged?" the doctor asked. Meghan says she discounted the idea at first. She'd drunk the Jell-O shots early in the evening; later she bought her own drinks. How could Havard have drugged her?
During an interview with the Dallas Observer in 2002 about GHB, Captain Mike Snellgrove, now chief of the SMU Police Department, had suggested one possibility (not in relation to Meghan's allegation against Havard): SMU police had reports that students were bribing bartenders at parties to slip GHB into their dates' drinks.
At her doctor's recommendation, Meghan went to see Cathey Souter, a counselor at the Women's Health Center. "She was saying, 'Are you sure this [being drugged] isn't a possibility?'" Meghan says. "It started becoming more concrete." After seeing Souter several times and evaluating her symptoms and Havard's behavior, Meghan concluded she had been drugged and raped.
Souter suggested that Meghan talk to an assistant dean, who explained Meghan's options: file charges with the SMU police or pursue a complaint within the University Judicial System, which handles violations of the Student Code of Conduct.
"It would be judged by my peers and would be completely confidential," Meghan says.
The weekend after it happened, Meghan told her parents she'd been raped. "I wanted her to press charges," Bruce Bodson says, "but she was so unclear about the events that she was really not comfortable with that until she'd had a chance to sort things out more."
Judy Bodson telephoned Souter, whom she calls the "one shining decent person in this whole fiasco."
"Dr. Souter said that before Meghan had put all the pieces together she was in denial," Judy says. "She [Souter] said she was quite certain it was rape, and it occurred with a drug assist." (Souter declined to comment about Meghan's case.)
Concluding that the campus judicial process wasn't appropriate--she wasn't confident that her complaint would be kept secret--Meghan, in early November, walked to the campus police station and told Captain Jones about the sexual assault. "I wanted to see what my options were," Meghan says. "I still wasn't sure about filing charges."
Jones didn't seem interested in pursuing the drug-rape allegation, Meghan says. He told Meghan she could lodge a written complaint but expressed little hope that anything would come of it. There was no physical evidence; too much time had passed. Given those odds, Meghan didn't want to file anything in writing.
"He perked up when I mentioned the fake IDs and the drugs," Meghan says. After Meghan handed over her phony license, Jones explained that Meghan had to provide the names of everybody involved. "I pretty much had to turn in my whole dorm," Meghan says.
On the condition that her involvement remain strictly confidential, Meghan agreed to Jones' request that she feed him information about Havard's operation and movements.