Surely, we cannot be the only people who didn't love Sideways. It was good, but we're still buying Boone's Farm, and we don't get what's the big deal about merlot. Shared Housing Center hops on the Sideways bandwagon for its fifth annual Wine Tasting and Treasure Hunt, which pays homage to the movie with wine and tapas and the treasure hunt's prize, which is a trip to Santa Barbara wine country. It starts at 6 p.m. with a martini bar and silent auction and ends at 9 p.m. after the food and drinks, treasure hunt and silent auction finale. Admission is $150 per person, and the event takes place at the Science Place in Fair Park. Call 214-821-8510.
Friday, June 3
It's such a vivid simile: Like a Dog on Linoleum. You can just see the dog. Four paws going in four directions, scrambling to get his footing, leaning and bending to steady himself, tail being used like a tightrope walker's pole. So when Leslie Jordan says he's felt like a dog on linoleum, you just get it. But the title of Jordan's one-man autobiographical show is just where the humor and cleverness start. The play, written and performed by Jordan (who just finished another season on Will & Grace as Beverley Leslie, the even-shorter-than-Megan Mullally nemesis to Karen Walker), was once called When You Swish Upon a Star. It takes viewers on a 90-minute tour of Jordan's life from his Southern Baptist childhood to drug and alcohol addiction to finally making it in Hollywood--at middle age. He tries to make lemonade from those times life gave him lemons, but sometimes he just stops his story for being too sad. Performances are 8 p.m. Friday and Saturday at the Majestic Theater, 1925 Elm St. Tickets are $35 to $80, with the $75 and $80 tickets also including an after-show party onstage with Jordan. Call Ticketmaster at 214-373-8000.
Saturday, June 4
There are some locations imbued with spirituality or mysticism or just something otherworldly. Sorry, Dallas, you are not one of them. So it makes sense that Dallas commercial photographer Ken Barker would routinely retreat to Taos, New Mexico, which is a lot closer than Stonehenge or Thebes. It also makes sense that his portfolio is packed with bizarre, surreal, cinematic and, yes, otherworldly photographs taken during those visits (he's back in Dallas now). Afterimage Photograph Gallery in the Quadrangle presents these as Out of Time: Photographs From the Ageless Landscape of Taos from June 4 through July 30. Barker and the gallery host an opening reception from 7:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. Saturday at Afterimage, 2800 Routh St. Call 214-871-9140.
Sunday, June 5
Remember in school when having class outdoors made even word problems and European history palatable? Sitting in the grass, even with ants and 100-degree-plus THIs, was better than being in a desk in an air-conditioned classroom. Now imagine being outdoors, on a blanket, with a picnic dinner. As the sun sets over the Fort Worth Botanic Garden, a band takes the stage and, in time for dessert, fireworks light up the grounds and the show's finale. No wonder the Concerts in the Garden Summer Music Festival is sold out year after year. And this season is even better: Every concert ends with fireworks; favorites such as oldies, Cajun, sci-fi and Fourth of July return, and the Polyphonic Spree and the Gatlin Brothers headline special shows. The series starts Friday with American Pie: 50 Years of Rock Classics. Saturday is C.J. Chenier & The Red Hot Louisiana Band, and, on Sunday, it's Moonlight Serenade with Glenn Miller and Friends. Gates open at 6:30 p.m. with concerts at 8 p.m. Lawn tickets are $14 in advance, $17 at the gate (except for the Polyphonic Spree show, which is $18 to $21). Adult table seats are $21 to $41 in advance, $25 to $45 at the gate. Children's table tickets are $10 to $1 [right price?] in advance, $10 to $45 at the gate. Parking is $5 to $15. Call 817-665-6000 or visit www.fwsymphony.org.
Monday, June 6
Garfield's Odie, Tom and Jerry's Spike, The Sylvester & Tweety Mysteries' Hector. Cats versus dogs drama has been complicating lives and enhancing story lines for decades. Too bad nobody mentioned this to Hank the Cowdog. So when Pete, the feline thorn in Hank's side, wins Hank's job as head of ranch security, Hank drags Pete out into the wild and leaves him to fight for his life with the coyotes. (Perhaps the sequel should be Hank the Cowdog Meets the SPCA.) Pete's absence makes Hank's life pretty darn boring, and a cat rescue mission is executed. See the actors of Plano Repertory Theatre bring Hank the Cowdog to life 10:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. June 2 through June 11, plus 3 p.m. Saturdays, at ArtCentre Theatre, 1028 15th Place, Plano. Tickets are $10. On June 4 from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m., Hank's creator, John Erickson, will join the theater in a celebration with a bounce house, ice cream, face painting and more. Call 972-442-7460 or visit www.planorep.org.
Tuesday, June 7
We consider ourselves innovators in the kitchen. Our cutting-edge uses of ingredients includes substituting broken taco shells for tortilla chips in nachos and, when we're out of milk, doubling the water and tripling the butter in instant mashed potatoes. The Food Network will be calling any day, we're sure. But for those who enjoy their food more fresh and less free, George Restaurant starts a rotating chef's menu June 7 that continues through July 1 with the menu changing each Tuesday. The $30 three-course dinners ($50 when paired with wines), created by chef George W. Brown Jr. and chef de cuisine Tim Bevins, are Tuesday through Friday from 5:30 p.m. to 7 p.m. only. Dishes include cannellini bean soup with olives, capers, Parmesan and herb crackers; spicy braised Berkshire pork with creamy ricotta polenta and sweet potatoes; and apricot and berry buckle with almond ice cream and honey caramel. George is located at 7709 Inwood Road. Call 214-366-9100 for reservations, which are recommended.