Page Pageant

The annual SportsPage beauty contest is sure to be a cultural event—if your idea of culture is skanky women in bikinis talking about what professional athlete they'd like to be stranded on a deserted island with. In a gathering of the dim that should be taking place in Mesquite rather than the heart of Dallas, the typically useless SportsPage is hosting a pageant where 15 "girls," as the paper calls them, compete to receive $1,000, a spot on the February cover and the affection of at least one stalker. Good times. According to the media advisory—oh, and for future reference, a press release about a skeevy beauty pageant should not be referred to as an advisory—the contestants will take to the stage for three 20-minute rounds while facing degrading questions from a female emcee. The "advisory" assures us that the women will be wearing bikinis among other outfits. The Annual SportsPage Girl of the Year Contest takes place from 7:30 p.m. to 11 p.m. Thursday at Dick’s Last Resort, Houston and N. Lamar streets. Call 214-747-0001.
Thu., Feb. 23, 7:30-11 p.m.