When you're young, there are so many things that you take for granted. Cellulite-free legs, for one. The ability to wear sleeveless clothing without drawing stares. Total lack of responsibility. Those winding-wire toys you push the beads around on at the doctor's office. But the most shameful of all? Kids these days just don't appreciate the fact that, after a certain age, it gets a little inappropriate to be drunk in the daytime. Nobody likes the guy in pleated Dockers at the Chili's bar knocking back a Calypso Cooler at 11:30 a.m. It's creepy. The one exception to the daytime drinking rule? Oktoberfest! Ja! Trade in your pleats for lederhosen and toast a stein of Paulaner as early as you like in the North Texas capital of daytime drunk (and pleats), Addison. Hopefully you'll drink so much you won't care that Oktoberfest isn't even in October. The festival runs Thursday through Sunday (hello, long weekend) at Addison Circle Park, 4970 Addison Circle Drive, and features a yodeling competition and a dachshund doggie parade. Admission is $5. Kids under 4 get in free, but don't think the little jerks won't drink your wallet dry. Call 972-450-2851.
Thu., Sept. 14, 5-11 p.m.; Fri., Sept. 15, 5 p.m.-midnight; Sat., Sept. 16, 11-midnight; Sun., Sept. 17, 11 a.m.-6 p.m.