Did you know that there are circa 1970 nude pictures of Dr. Laura Schlessinger (aka Dr. Whore-a) on the Internet? (I'll wait while you go fact-check that.) During her radio show on 100.7 The Jesus, she says sex before marriage is immoral. But those nekkid Internet hippie boobs of hers say "Do me! Premaritally!" It's possible that you might barf if you see these pictures, but I guarantee you'll barf if you see her in person at 11:15 a.m. Saturday when Dr. Laura Buhgina will be promoting her book, The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage, at the Dallas Bridal Show at Market Hall, 2200 Stemmons Freeway. I'll be there for the part when she calls gay folk "biological errors," calls working women bad mothers and claims to be cooler than the Virgin Mary, causing every person in Market Hall to yell in unison, "Aw, hell no!" as they rip off their veils and rush the stage to kick her white ass (It really is. I've seen it). Entry to the bridal show is $10 cash for dirty, whorish adults and $5 cash for illegitimate children and gay babies under 14. Call 972-713-9920 or visit bridalshowsinc.com.
Sat., Jan. 27