By Jim Schutze
By Rachel Watts
By Lauren Drewes Daniels
By Anna Merlan
By Lee Escobedo
By Alice Laussade
By Scott Reitz
Bizarre Resurgence: Ladies and gentlemen, America—yes, that America, "Horse With No Name" America—now have a MySpace page. Something should be done about this, and it should probably be violent.
This Song Will Change Your Life: Matisyahu's cover of "Message in a Bottle." The Police are threatening to re-form just so they can trick Matisyahu into joining them on stage, at which point they will do something violent about this.
TV Party: People who seem genuinely shocked and offended that the I'm With Rolling Stone interns are doing interesting and fun and telegenic things, as opposed to normal intern drudgery. For painstakingly accurate reality programming, we kindly direct you to C-SPAN.
Journalistic Coup: The Onion headline "Area Man Takes Metallica Audio Tour of Art Museum." Gahhahaahahaha.
PR One-Sheet Buzzword: "Late-arriving melodies." About as desirable as "late-arriving dinner," "late-arriving prophylactics" or "late-arriving medical attention."