The Green Mile

Even the shamrocks are shit-faced

I'm Irish (What? Laussade is totally an Irish name. I shortened it from McO'Malleylaussade). Being part of the Irish club is cool. It means I'm lucky, I sunburn easily, and my alcoholism and my inability to cook are genetic. If you're Irish, or you like Irish stuff or you just want to drink and cuss out the Scottish with thousands of people, be awesome and check out the Greenville Avenue St. Patrick's Day Parade 11 a.m. Saturday at Greenville Avenue at Blackwell Street. There'll be more than 1,700 people in the parade, floats, prizes for the best costumes, leprechauns (Don't call 'em "little people," by the way. They'll bite you in the knee.), an after-party ($10) featuring the Toadies at Energy Square on the corner of Greenville Avenue and University Boulevard (but if you don't have a pot of tickets to the Toadies concert at the end of a rainbow, you miss out on that part because it's sold out) and, of course, green beer. Because what's more Irish than beer with green food coloring in it? Nothing. Except maybe an Irish guy barfing green beer. Ride the DART Light Rail to Park Lane or Lovers Lane so you can get your drunken ass home after. Call 214-757-9000 or visit dallasobserver.com.
Sat., March 17, 11 a.m.
 
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