Help Wanted

Help wanted: Here's a little inside Dallas Observer baseball stuff for you: Our editor, Julie Lyons, is departing in January to write a book; Girl on Top Andrea Grimes is leaving to attend graduate school at UT-Austin and continue her work as a stand-up comedian; staff writer Matt Pulle is heading to Nashville to our sister paper, the Scene, to become managing editor.

But not to worry, loyal reader, Buzz is staying put.

Yeah, we know. At least the paper is still free.

It's hard saying goodbye to talented co-workers. A lesser person might respond to the defections by spreading scurrilous rumors that Andrea is leaving because she has insulted so many bars and their male customers that she's reduced to sitting at home with her cats, sipping Jack and Coke. Or that Matt is leaving to mend a heart wounded over a breakup with ex-constable Mike Dupree. Or that Julie's book will be about her wild days as a teenage groupie for Journey.

Luckily, Buzz is above vicious rumor-mongering this week. (We are keeping the office supplies under lock and key, though.)

The good news is that we have some openings, so keep an eye out for that Observer pickup truck, soon to make an appearance at a day laborer gathering point near you. It's a pretty good gig here, amigos—certainly far better than being a cop. (Watch as Buzz sets a personal best here for bizarre segues.)

We say this because we just spoke with Brad Kirby, a Dallas photographer who says he's filed an internal affairs complaint against a Dallas cop for allegedly failing to properly investigate the disappearance of Kirby's two Siberian huskies in late October. Kirby says his dogs were stolen from his yard. Thanks to an implanted microchip, one of the pooches was found at the Garland pound, and from there Kirby managed to track down the alleged dog thief. That guy didn't have the other missing dog on him, however, and since you can't dust a dog for fingerprints, the cops told Kirby that they couldn't arrest anyone for theft. Which makes sense, unless you're dealing with a man who loves his dogs, which is why it sucks to be a cop, which is a job, like reporter and editor. See, it all makes perfect sense. (Maybe gin and cough syrup for breakfast is not the great idea it seems.)

Anyhow, Kirby is appearing before city council this week to urge them to require vets to scan all pets for microchips when they get their rabies vaccination, and to allow some prosecution of anyone who unlawfully possesses someone else's microchipped dog. One of those is not a bad idea. The other? Well, city council member is another job we wouldn't want to have.

 
  • 12/08/2007 10:06:00 PM

    We are all going to miss Bible Girl and the path that she had chosen for us to follow. I, for one will be confused for a while. Should I go left, right, or straight? The lack of direction by Julie Lyons will leave us all in one big confused lurch. Where else but in a blog called Bible Girl can a gay man be questioned about his dirty rectum while the virtues of post enema spankings are part of the de rigueur for Julie's own COC. Who can forget her gal pal who refused to allow a penis into her vagina because, well just because and said girl's claim to fame was having slept with a Buzzcock. She introduced us to Prophetess Janice who turned out to be more of a Profitess. Of course, one of my personal favorites was the laying of hands on the "goldfish" that Julie, herself brought back to life. If only Iraq were a bit closer to home. We prayed with Julie as her gal pal in Christ, Paula White found herself in the middle of a nasty divorce, (no doubt due to gay's destroying the sanctity of marriage)and later found herself being investigated for using church funds for private jets and fake finger nails. Julie has always seemed really taken with photos of black men touching their chin. That is something we both have in common. Most of all, I love that Julie could take as well as she could give. She could have easily (and perhaps many think should have) had my dirty rectum thrown off this blog months ago. She didn't. In fact I remember once when I posted under another name, she called me on it, not for the content of the post but for not having the balls to put my name with them. While we never convinced each other of anything, Julie Lyons never tried to be anyone other than Julie Lyons and she put proudly attached her name to her viewpoints. I will miss the debate, no matter how frothy, snarky, or even "unfair" she or I might have considered it. Jack Jett

 

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