Review: Anton Cafe

Giant American flag count: 1
Tiny Greek flag count: 50

Gyro (pronounced yeero and not jyro or guyro) is Greek for half-moon, soft taco-looking thing filled with yummy lamb. And when you've got a hankerin' to eat lots of stuff you're uncomfortable pronouncing aloud, Anton Café downtown delivers.

I ordered the gyro plate, which comes with pita bread, lamb, onions, tomatoes, lettuce and tzatziki sauce. (Insider tip: You think you want the gyro sandwich combo because it comes with chips, but you really want the gyro plate. It's a build-your-own gyros setup with all the food items separated on it, so if you don't like onions or tomatoes you can make a DIY gyro lambed-out just the way you want it—and more important, they really load the plate up with food, so it means you get way more gyro for your money.) I ordered it spicy, and they globbed a healthy portion of bright red sauce with angry-looking seeds in it on my plate (flash forward to me sweating profusely and regretting eating the spicy stuff later, but loving the taste of it at the time). I got a drink with my order and it came out way less than 10 bucks. (I chose a Diet Dr Pepper, but the Hawaiian Punch looked pretty tasty, too, so that was a tough call. It should be mentioned that any drink in a can comes with your combo, except for Red Bull. That's because, according to Anton, Red Bull isn't in a can. And if you get a chance to see Anton, I don't think you'll decide to question him on that.) It was more food than I could finish, and I paid only $7.08.

As I watched the lady behind the counter shave my pieces of lamb off the huge chunk of meat, I did make a note to self that although they do serve some veggie-friendly options at this establishment, their happy display of cute little Lamb Chop up on that spike might make hippie vegans start seizing out. So, be a doll and skip bringing your animal rights activist mom here. Otherwise, she might vomit on you. I have no concrete research that shows that vomit + tzatziki = funky, but I'm betting it would be your not favorite.