Trolling Right-Wing Political Blogs Proves That November Can't Come Too Soon

HISTORY: Began posting at Live From the WTC (later Asymmetrical Information) as "Jane Galt" shortly after 9/11, with Randian tropes and denunciations of "Lefty Idiocy." Advocated patriotism, war, the execution of John Walker Lindh and the beating of noisome war protesters with "a two-by-four," the uproar over which made McArdle briefly quit blogging ("-30-"), only to return a week later, accusing her opponents of incivility. Struck libertarian themes—for example, opposing subsidized health care that would treat "the guy who's been overeating for the last 30 years" the same as worthier sick people—but frequently played both ends against the middle, as when she chided Phillip Morris for introducing a Christmas "holiday cigarette" while asking: "What the hell is the Campaign for Tobacco-Free Kids doing complaining about this...Of course, we all knew that the kids were a smokescreen for the fact that these activists don't like tobacco, period." Also refrained from endorsing gay marriage, advocating "humility" from libertarians on social issues and quoting G.K. Chesterton. Enlivened her output with posts about the problems of being tall ("I've decided to start my own guerrilla movement, designed to force the world to accommodate larger size people") and other puckish subjects. These increased in frequency as Republican policies became less popular, even among her readers. Eventually abandoned her previous affection for the Iraq War while complaining that war opponents were trying to make her look bad ("Do you get credit for being right, or being lucky?"). Worked briefly at The Economist; later picked up by The Atlantic, for whom she blogs now under her own name, but in a similar (though apparently more heavily edited) manner.

WHAT TO EXPECT: Will renounce Obama when it is revealed that he once laughed at a Richard Pryor routine with anti-Semitic content.

Ann Althouse
Althouse
althouse.blogspot.com

ORIENTATION: "Moderate" Democrat who disapproves of nearly everything the Democratic Party does

TONE: Free-associative

FUN FACT: Reduced to tears at a libertarian conference at which libertarian issues were frankly discussed: "I am struck by how deeply and seriously libertarians and conservatives believe in their ideas." Later, a liberal blogger defended Althouse, who then attacked the liberal blogger ("you obviously believe I simply fail to believe strongly enough in liberal and left-wing principles").

CANDIDATE: No coherently stated preference

STUPID/EVIL RATIO: 80/20

HISTORY: University of Wisconsin Law School professor; author of numerous articles and papers, including "Thelma & Louise and the Law: Do Rape Shield Rules Matter?" Began blog in 2004 with posts about law and reality-TV shows; denunciations of Democrats, including John Kerry ("boring us to death over the next 8 months"); and praise for Bush ("I feel a strong connection to this man and what we've been through together"). Complained that Democratic campaign literature was "always trying to scare me about things that are about to happen." Over time, Althouse's style has become more eccentric. She analyzed at length a Hillary Clinton video, finding vaginal significance in its use of onion rings. She noted the prominence of large-breasted woman in group photo of bloggers with Bill Clinton and suggested that readers confused by this revealed a "willful blindness to the criticism of Clinton." She also began frequently posting her drawings and photographs. Voted for Obama in Wisconsin primary because his "growing power allowed me to cast off my resignation." Has since posted quotes and citations mostly critical of Obama.

MODUS OPERANDI: Favors piquant reversals, e.g., complains about sexism mainly when she perceives it among liberals ("Atrios managed to summon up worse misogynists [in his comments section] than [anti-Islam blogger] Charles Johnson did"). Defended Justice Alito: "Where are the passionate, Brennan-esque liberals of yore, who really believed we have rights?" Frequently posts comments at unsympathetic Web sites ("Really, why are you writing for [The New Republic] when your diligence and comprehension are at such a low level"). Gleefully attributes baffled reactions to the power of "the Althouse vortex."

WHAT TO EXPECT: Something—a news photo, a quote, a gum wrapper on the sidewalk—will annoy her and she'll go to McCain, especially if he runs with Romney. ("I think they look great together. They seem to loosen each other up.")

Charles Johnson
Little Green Footballs
www.littlegreenfootballs.com

ORIENTATION: Anti-Islamo-everything

TONE: Unrelenting

FUN FACT: Coined the terms idiotarian and anti-idiotarian for, respectively, people who don't think like him and people who do.

CANDIDATE: None, but prone to close late and reliably anti-idiotarian (Republican)

STUPID/EVIL RATIO: 40/60