45 Movie Trends That Need to Die Right Now (A Sequel)
THIS MOVIE'S TITLE IS A TWITTER HASH TAG
See also: 55 Movie Trends That Need to Die Now.
Somewhere on Earth right now, an Alf movie is in the works.
Rebooting and rehashing big film ideas isn't a new Hollywood trend, but the modern Hollywood is notable for taking a huge, caustic dump on an already-beloved franchise.
Earlier this year, we noted 55 trends that we thought needed to be blown up like so many buildings in a Michael Bay film. Thanks to Judge Dredd, Total Recall, Paranormal Activity 106, new trailers for G.I. Joe, and the exhausting influx of mostly terrible horror films (Cabin in the Woods was actually awesome), we have a new list.
1. Demonic possession 2. Oh my God! The ghost hand is coming from my hair / mouth / sheets / shirt! 3. Movies with Internet slang as a title 4. The You Already Know This Movie's Bad So We'll Mark Up the Ticket Price By Making It 3D marketing strategy 5. Man, Clint Eastwood sure is angry and alone 6. The found footage / "home video" shot-movie 7. The lack of respect for awesome puppets (AKA Alf being in development) 8. Any future plans with Jurassic Park sequels 9. Ghostbusters 3 without Bill Murrary 10. Sylvester Stallone
Intensely serious Fairy Tale adapation.
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Elles Ent. Fashion Show
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11. Arnold Schwarzenegger 12. A Rocketeer reboot 13. Finding Nemo 2 14. Dax Shepard 15. Whatever the hell is happening with the remake of Videodrome 16. The immutably serious fairy-tale adaptation 17. Shockingly boring movies about the Thunder God 18. Lack of appreciation for Guy Pearce 19. Jim Carrey in a kids movie 20. Thinly-veiled attempts to reproduce The Hangover or Bridesmaids 21. Fake IMAX 22. 3D Fake IMAX 23. Characters falling from buildings onto cars unharmed 24. Characters falling through windows unharmed 25. Face punches that leave no marks 26. Characters exposed to space unharmed 27. Bad James Bond movies 28. CGI blood 29. CGI Yoda in a live-action film 30. The superhero origin story 31. Ron Howard thinks he's cool 32. Shitty Dr. Seuss adaptations 33. Fast the Furious: Whatever The Fuck sequels 34. Eddie Murphy 35. We need a African American character so let's cast a famous rapper that can't act 36. Movies based on Hasbro toys 37. The torturous, hair-ripping eternity where commercials are screened before films' trailers, then three hours of trailers, then the movie 38. Milla Jovovich action films 39. Misuse of really funny SNL or Daily Show-based actors 40. "The bullet went clean through so I'm fine" 41. The unbelievable wait in between P.T. Anderson films 42. The superhero learns his super powers montage 43. Perfunctory Liam Neeson casting 44. Oliver Stone sucking 45. Films whose only premise is to revitalize Tom Cruise's career
Bonus ending movie trend: Any future JFK movie not shot in Dallas
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