Dallas hasn’t been the same since The Real Housewives of Dallas wrapped its first season back in May.
No one here can handle the limbo of "is there or isn't there a season 2?" Our district attorney and police chief both posted their resignation and stray dogs have just been wandering the streets.
Although the other new member of the franchise, Real Housewives of Potomac, was renewed in April and is already filming, Bravo hasn’t announced a second season of Dallas' mediocre-rated version. Executive producer Andy Cohen has said that he's evaluating whether it's possible to strengthen the show enough for it to continue.
With no official word on Real Housewives of Dallas' fate, we thought we'd offer Cohen some advice on how to spice it up and increase those poor ratings.
Remember when Heidi Dillon embarrassed Cary Deuber at her State Fair-themed party by asking her to perform fellatio on a corn dog? Dillon clearly knows what she’s doing, and we think she'd make a great Head Bitch in Charge with LeeAnne Locken as her sidekick.
Marie Reyes should also be promoted to full Housewife, given that her relationship with Locken goes back 20 years and she recently filed a restraining order against her. There are some great storylines between those two that haven’t been told yet.
Keep Brandi Redmond and Stephanie Hollman because our social media stalking tells us that the former best friends have hit a rough patch. While in season 1 they brought humor, in season 2 they could bring drama.
Explore Existing Friendships
Is it Deuber who's causing the rift between Redmond and Hollman? Real Housewives fans want more cat fights and fewer fart jokes. Also, Reyes has been friends with Locken far too long not to have some good dirt. And what about Dillon and Locken’s friendship? Locken bows down to nobody except quite possibly Dillon. Why? Something's fishy.
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One major problem with the first season of The Real Housewives of Dallas was its lack of diversity, particularly striking since Dallas itself is so diverse. Erica Annise, a friend of Locken’s featured during episode 4 of season 1, would be a great addition, as would Jennifer Hartman, a notable presence in the Dallas charity scene.
Give More Screen Time to the Husbands and Boyfriends
When the women pretend to be classy and well-respected, their husbands or gay best friends are always available to step in and say what’s on everyone’s mind.
There’s Angel Reyes, husband to Marie, a high-power attorney who's never afraid to voice his opinion concerning the other women.
And Rich Emberlin, Locken’s boyfriend, always has a face that says, “I can’t believe I’m part of this nonsense.” Speaking of those two, why aren't they married when Locken so desperately wants it? Is that any of our business? No, but they signed up for this, not us.