Shocker that we're leading with 'Big Rich Texas'
Quite a bit of talk surrounding the Style Network "docudrama" this week, and none of it has to do with the show's actual content. The evil blonde boss lady on BRT whom everyone seems to hate and/or fear, Pam, has decided to get real-life legal on the asses of a few Dallas socialites. One of her targets in a complaint filed in county court is fellow cast member Bonnie, the dingy biology professor, teen-fiction author and recording artist. (I just looked at Bonnie's website. I'm amazed that she has so many hidden talents. Ahem.)
Also originally named in the complaint but later dropped is D Magazine's regular Big Rich Texas recapper. The fact that a writer landed in the middle of such a mess doesn't scare me in the slightest. First of all, I don't even know enough about the ladies on this show to be able to share their last names with you. I cover them as fictional characters because, to anyone outside their bubble, that's what they are. I won't attend social events unless the dress is casual and the bar is open. If I were ever to run into these ladies at, say, a country club that's so far away it's nearly not in Texas, I'd compliment them on their terrific acting and move on.
I do have one bone to pick with Pam, Miss Legal Eagle Justice Seeker. One of her reasons for filing this complaint is perceived "cyber-bullying" against her. Don't get me started on reality stars hijacking for their own storylines an issue that should be taken much more seriously.
Cyber-bullying alters kids' lives, makes them feel like outcasts and sometimes leads to their untimely exits from this world. When grown women on any reality show try to portray their trumped-up rivalries and gossip as dangerous acts of bullying, I have a hard time feeling sympathetic.
And Pam's not the only reality actress to cry "bully." I seem to recall a Real Housewives reunion or two in which cast members accuse each other of bullying (or, at the very least, "mean-tweeting"). People who are overly sensitive about their public images probably shouldn't let cameras into their drunken dinner parties and plastic-surgery consultations. I'm done here.
Oh, you still wanna know what happened on the show? Hmm, let's see. Bonnie hears through the country-club grapevine that her 24-year-old daughter, Whitney, is the target of STD rumors. So she subjects Whitney to a full slate of tests at the doctor's office to clear things up once and for all. The two people who started the STD rumor are a dude and his god-sister who've recently begun doing the nasty in the home of their guardian, a pageant taskmaster. Pam and Bonnie come to blows once again (surprise, surprise) at a country club charity event. At one point, Pam says, "Don't call me a bitch, bitch!" That's generally one of my favorite sentences in the English language, so I give her style (network) points for that. As long as she doesn't sue me.
ON OTHER SHOWS ...
-- GCB continued to back away from its initial cartoonish approach, opting instead to further develop its core characters. The fabbalus Gigi (Annie Potts) decides to risk her rep and date her longtime secret soulmate, a big, rich lug with a heart condition who's just lost his wife. And, he happens to be the uncle of her daughter's nemesis. Wait, did I just say this show was less cartoonish now? Scratch that. Like BRT, the episode ends with a charity event -- Dallas' fictional wealthy just love to give back. Sheryl Crow performs, sings a song that probably popped up Sunday on iTunes' front page. The magic of marketing.
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-- Hollie Cavanagh's still going strong-ish (until tonight's results show, at least) on American Idol. Last night's '80s-themed eppi saw her perform twice. Her solo song? The theme from Flashdance. Mixed reviews. She's got the chops, judges say, but not the heart. I expected Randy Jackson to say something like, "Hey Ryan, Hey Jennifer and Steven. THIS GIRL DOESN'T GOTTA HAVE IT!" Her other performance was a duet with DeAndre, whose ridiculous hair sucked all the oxygen out of the theater.
-- I'm a fan of the original Storage Wars ("YEEEEEEEP!"), so it's disappointing that the personalities aren't as sharply defined on the spinoff, Storage Wars: Texas. Rather than having disparate characters competing against each other in auction, SWT seems to feature only bargain hunters and bottom-feeders, people who are more interested in scoring boring, sure-bet items out of bins than stuff that's one-of-a-kind. But I'm judging based on a single episode, one that redeemed itself toward the end when one of the bidders took an old toy calculator he'd found into Deep Ellum's retro store Millennium for an appraisal. Any media love for that store makes me happy, since I've spent hours and hours in there digging through records, books and '80s toys that ooze nostalgia. I'll keep watching to see where the storage whores end up next, I suppose.
-- Khloe and Lamar threatened to get a million times more Texas-y during this weekend's episode, when the former Laker finally found out he was being traded to the Mavs. His wife took the sudden upheaval as well as can be expected. Dallas can't be too bad, right? After all, it does allow camera crews. To be continued ...