We always thought our family was weird. And, well, we were right. What we didn't realize was that we weren't the only ones taking a dip in dysfunction. The world is filled with crazies, and, amazingly, they're not all related to us. This revelation began to sink in sometime during eighth-grade theater arts class when we were introduced to such classic plays as The Glass Menagerie by Tennessee Williams. This bleak drama about the worrisome Wingfield clan took us deep into its characters' world till we could almost feel their suffocation. Brother Tom escapes his troubles with booze while sister Laura suffers shyness so severe her only friends are the collection of glass animals she admires. Father Wingfield, who fled the family years ago, makes his only appearance as a photograph on the wall, and psychological case studies must have been invented for women like matriarch Amanda. They're a troubled bunch, for sure, but these characters have stuck with us, eliciting not pity so much as an odd mix of sadness and relief. The Dallas Theater Center presents The Glass Menagerie from October 22 through November 16 at the Kalita Humphreys Theater, 3636 Turtle Creek Blvd. Tickets are $14 to $59. Call 214-522-8499. --Rhonda Reinhart
Strap on your moshing shoes and ready your air sitar, because things at Southern Methodist University's McFarlin Auditorium at 6400 Hillcrest Ave. are about to get a little fricking crazy. That's right: The world's foremost nü-metal Indian artist, Ravi Shankar, is coming to town to ignite a wild night of crowd surfing and Indian classical jams. All right, so the aforementioned description is a complete stretch of the imagination, but we think that at the wizened age of 83 Shankar could stand to, you know, hip it up. Cool out with the kids, as the jocks say in front of the sock hop. Of course, his music has been consistently popular for decades, and, for a sitar artist, he's done his fair share of experimentation in an otherwise traditional genre. Still, we figure one Shankar visit to Urban Outfitters could do the trick. At any rate, his only Texas tour stop will feature daughter Anoushka Shankar, and the father-daughter duo will trade sitar solos Saturday at 8 p.m. She's been studying under her father since the age of 9 and has already garnered critical acclaim in his footsteps, but we're not sure if she'll join pops in the mosh pit. Tickets are $10 to $55 at 214-528-5576 for this TITAS presentation. --Sam Machkovech
Caterwauls and screams are the usual Halloween sounds. The Texas Radio Theatre Company spices that up with a triple shot of creepy audio drama. Check those morals in The Monkey's Paw; take a trip back with the eerie, old-time, sci-fi series feel of Ten Minutes to Touchdown and finish up with a spookfest from The Generic Radio Workshop. Hear fear Friday at 7:30 p.m. at Creative Arts Theatre and School, 1100 W. Randoll Mill Road, Arlington (817-265-8512), or tune in at 7:30 p.m. Sunday at The Coffee Haus at Lincoln Square (817-274-0006). --Merritt Martin
Congratulations, you're inheriting a great deal of money. On the other hand, your mother's a whore. Vivie, while coming of age, is learning just what sort of savvy businesswoman Mom was and where the Warren fortune comes from. A moral dilemma, no? When Mama worked in the oldest profession do you praise her for thwarting oppression (as playwright George Bernard Shaw does) or hide in shame? Theatre Three tells all in Mrs. Warren's Profession, running Thursday through November 22 at 2800 Routh St. Tickets are $10 to $35 at www.theatre3dallas.com. --Merritt Martin
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You have it comin' at PRT
Profile of a die-hard Chicago fan: You have "I Hart Roxie" tattooed in an indiscreet location. You've popped, sixed and squished your way through the DVD version at least a hundred times. You always sing "Mr. Cellophane" at karaoke bars (much to the chagrin of your loved ones). If you can't get enough of "murder, greed, corruption, violence, exploitation, adultery and treachery--all those things we hold near and dear to our hearts" (and who can?), you're in luck. And you don't even have to hop a plane to New York City. Plano Repertory Theatre's presentation of the hit musical stars locals Leslie McDonel and Whitney Rose Cone as Velma Kelly and Roxie Hart, respectively. And we could, uh, maybe suggest a few local lawyers to portray Billy Flynn, but we imagine actor Paul Taylor will do just fine. "Our culture continues to find fascination with the ups and downs of celebrity life," says artistic director Ryan Pointer. "So-called reality TV and celebrity crime...it all smacks of Chicago." Take your husband, your boyfriend or both of 'em--they'll see what happens to cheating, double-crossing lovers and guys who chew their gum too loudly. Or if you're not the types to both reach for the gun and you just want to rouge your knees and roll your stockings down, we know a noisy hall where there's a nightly brawl: The Courtyard Theatre, 1509 H Ave., Plano. The musical opens October 16 and runs through November 9, with shows Thursday through Sunday. Tickets are $24 to $42 and can be purchased at the box office, 1104 Capital Ave., Suite 100, Plano, or by calling 972-422-7460. --Michelle Martinez