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2008 Stories by Alice Laussade

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  • Ojeda's Always Answers That Certain Craving. You Know the One.

    published December 18, 2008

    Tortilla chip bucket refill count: 4 Gallons of mouth-on-fire salsa consumed count: 2 Sometimes you just feel like... More >>

  • Gazeebo Burgers: A Big Bite of Nothing

    published December 4, 2008

    Extra "e" in the name count: 1 Actual gazebo in the parking lot count: 1 I was having one of those "Can't Decide... More >>

  • Henk's European Deli Fulfills Our Sausage Fantasies—Most of 'Em Anyway

    published November 27, 2008

    Horseradish jar on my table count: 1 Beer bottles lining the wall count: 100 Five-liter bottle of Grolsch count: 1 I was... More >>

  • Greenz Is About More Than Salads and Creative Spelling

    published November 20, 2008

    Lunch plate delivered to me at my table count: 1 Times my tea was refilled for me: 2 Actual waiters working in this... More >>

  • Chip’s Old Fashioned Hamburgers

    published November 13, 2008

    Panic attack count: 1 Packed tables count: 12 When I'm feeling like eating a burger but I don't want all that convenience and... More >>

  • Take a dip with Mattito's and Bob

    published November 6, 2008

    Free valet that I didn't feel bad not tipping count: 1 Minutes I had to wait before I got a table count: 10 When I want... More >>

  • The Mint is Heavy on Fusion and Light on Spice

    published October 30, 2008

    Real chopsticks (not the kind you get wrapped in paper) count: 2 People playing cards at the table next to mine count:... More >>

  • Bangkok City

    published October 23, 2008

    Awesome beard count: 1 Snooty Dallasites count: 0 With the economy in the shitter, it's getting harder and harder for... More >>

  • Salad Creations

    published October 16, 2008

    Tongs count: 50 Skinny bitches count: 50 So, after a friend of mine gave me a hard time about never trying to find anything... More >>

  • Texadelphia Cuts the Mustard

    published October 9, 2008

    SMUchebag count: 6-8 Really good lemonade count: 1 I was so in the mood for some cheap wings and waffle fries the other... More >>

  • Hickory House Barbecue

    published October 2, 2008

    Mama Carol's teeth count: 4 Overalls count: 3 My latest rule for how to spot a good place for lunch is that if the... More >>

  • Blackjack Pizza

    published September 25, 2008

    Toilets in the women's restroom that are on a platform that makes you feel like your peeing onstage count: 1 Credit cards accepted... More >>

  • Taco Joint

    published September 18, 2008

    Jalapeño ranch and salsa bar count: 1 Times I was amazed by how good crispy tacos could be count: 50 Urban Taco... More >>

  • Bland on Bland

    published September 18, 2008

    Parking in front of Naan Korean Grill & Sushi Bar isn't free unless you drive a hybrid. They actually have meters in front of every... More >>

  • Chef Wang

    published September 11, 2008

    Other people in line in front of me count: 10 Minutes before I got my food count: 5 I'll say it. I love Wang. When I get a... More >>

  • Hello, Dali

    published September 11, 2008

    At first glance, Dali Wine Bar & Cellar is a 7-Eleven. You drive down Routh Street, take a left at the 7-Eleven corporate offices sign... More >>

  • Hook Line and Sinker

    published September 4, 2008

    Single-serving bottles of Beringer on the counter count: 8 People in line in front of me count: 4 Hook Line & Sinker... More >>

  • Alligator Café

    published August 28, 2008

    People eating fried whole catfish with tails and everything count: 4 Cop count: 3 When you're driving around Dallas looking... More >>

  • Cheap Bastard

    published August 21, 2008

    Times I got yelled at: 1 Slices I wish I had been able to eat: 40 I used to go to this place on Main Street called Café Ravenna,... More >>

  • Galindo's

    published August 14, 2008

    Beer posters with boob girls on them count: 3 Creepy, anthropomorphized jalapeño with gloves on the menu count:... More >>

  • JG's

    published August 7, 2008

    Fuddruckers-esque decorations count: a million and seven Patio count: 1 Sonics within a 2-mile radius count:... More >>

  • Cowboy Chow

    published July 31, 2008

    Buffalo head on the wall count: 2 Dishtowel napkin on my lap count: 1 Just down the street from Commerce's... More >>

  • Jumbo Super Buffet

    published July 24, 2008

    Buffet rounds I survived count: 2 Chicken lo mein burps per hour after eating count: 142 Located right next to a DART... More >>

  • Miss Chicken

    published July 17, 2008

    Hot sauce packets I got with my order count: 10 Times I thought they might sell Canadian boner pills to me in a back room if I said... More >>

  • Jersey Mike's Subs

    published July 10, 2008

    Tropicana Fruit Punch at the fountain count: 1 SMUchebag count: 5 Jersey Mike's has a line out the door and zero... More >>

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