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2004 Stories by Dave Faries

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  • Down for the Count

    published December 16, 2004

    There's art and there's math. Great lovers of the past--Casanova, Mae West, Pepe Le Pew--approached sexual conquest as an art form. They... More >>

  • Blanking the Slate

    published December 9, 2004

    Oh, boy. Over the past several years people often wrote in urging us to dine on organ meats, find a cocktail we couldn't stomach or sit down... More >>

  • Not All There

    published November 18, 2004

    Kent Rathbun leaned back in his chair, glanced in our general direction and ran his fingers over a case, which we knew contained a set of... More >>

  • Burning Question

    published November 11, 2004

    Just last week the Burning Question crew stumbled upon a major scientific discovery. We noticed that as Americans become more selective in... More >>

  • The Price of Fame

    published November 4, 2004

    Everyone who plunks down a significant amount of change to open a bar or club wrestles with this week's question. Popularity means sales,... More >>

  • A Phrase That Pays

    published October 28, 2004

    Let's set the scene, because this particular incident took place about 10 years ago. We were running a bit late, our timetable disrupted by a... More >>

  • Kitchen Detention

    published October 21, 2004

    Chefs and restaurant owners often whine about those paid to critique their establishments, contending that reviewers should have some kitchen... More >>

  • Vine Cuts

    published October 7, 2004

    Thousands of restaurants and bars in this city vie for attention from a small number of media outlets and journalists. Now throw in the PR types,... More >>

  • Past Prime Time

    published September 23, 2004

    Those old enough probably remember Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom, a popular television series in which the hosts tracked hungry beasts... More >>

  • What’s Not Cooking?

    published September 9, 2004

    Sometimes, after we've called in sick with a strange "stomach virus," we spend the day testing Bloody Mary recipes and watching cooking shows.... More >>

  • Dram Good

    published August 26, 2004

    When asked to evaluate the art of bartending, few people mention the drink itself. "It's not the drink, but your actions behind the bar that... More >>

  • Think Pink

    published August 19, 2004

    Europeans often complain that Americans lack sophistication, particularly when it comes to matters of leisure. Our faults are many: We refuse... More >>

  • Sweet Things

    published August 12, 2004

    Believe us, we've been involved in some pretty despicable acts. There was the night we convinced a noted chef to chug wine straight from the... More >>

  • Making the Connection

    published August 5, 2004

    The defining moment came on a Tuesday night at The Quarter. Clusters of men and women milled about and intermingled casually, but the night was... More >>

  • Unlisted Numbers

    published July 22, 2004

    Remember the '90s? Most of the world loved us, everybody had money to spend, we could kick back at Dallas restaurants and whip out a cigar...which... More >>

  • Big Shucking Deal

    published July 15, 2004

    Yeah, we downed dozens upon dozens of oysters while researching this week's topic. Now we're certain to die--this being a month with no... More >>

  • Innards and Outs

    published July 1, 2004

    We confess: This week's Burning Question reached us about, oh, eight months ago. Good idea, we thought at the time--but then we deleted it... More >>

  • Feed the Need

    published June 24, 2004

    Dallas cares. It really does. Voters approved $3 million to fund an assistance center for the homeless. The city just can't decide where to... More >>

  • A Manner of Drinking

    published June 17, 2004

    Etiquette is a social minefield. Codes of conduct exist for just about every occasion in every subculture. At local bars, twentysomething guys... More >>

  • Starring Roles

    published June 10, 2004

    Nancy Nichols, D magazine's restaurant critic, despises the use of stars to rate restaurants. "There's too much time between reviews,... More >>

  • The Hole Thing

    published May 20, 2004

    Dallas has often been described as fickle, pretentious or something in between fickle and pretentious. We're not certain about the correct word,... More >>

  • Fete Feats

    published May 6, 2004

    We are, generally speaking, a timid culture seeking vicarious means of adventure. There's no need to look far for examples. When Robin... More >>

  • Heads Up

    published April 22, 2004

    Poets, sages and thinkers of great magnitude have grappled for centuries with the fundamental mysteries standing in the way of human... More >>

  • Nature Calls

    published April 1, 2004

    Humans long ago declared victory in our long struggle to overcome the forces of nature. We spray on tans, burn Duraflame logs, flash huge CZ rings... More >>

  • Taste Makes Waste

    published March 25, 2004

    This exchange actually occurred between two members of the Burning Question crew after a night of research in which we visited The Meridian Room,... More >>

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