rss Email Author Gregory Weinkauf

2003 Stories by Gregory Weinkauf

Archives: 2004 | 2003 | 2002 | 2001 | 2000 | 1999
  • Upper Middle Earth

    published December 18, 2003

    You know how it's often the ones we love whose flaws are most apparent? Well, when it comes to The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the... More >>

  • Limp Pianist

    published December 11, 2003

    Just when you thought it was safe to go back into Hungary and listen to a song that supposedly causes people to kill themselves, along comes... More >>

  • Time Out of Mind

    published November 27, 2003

    Michael Crichton seems pretty clever. The doctor-screenwriter-novelist digs odd history (Eaters of the Dead, a.k.a. The 13th... More >>

  • Kitty Litter

    published November 20, 2003

    If you're hankering for a movie about an awkward yet lovable "outsider" type who wanders into a pastel mock-up of Middle America and cajoles the... More >>

  • Cruise Control

    published November 13, 2003

    Russell Crowe to his agent: "More Oscar-bait. Now." Agent, considering his cut of Crowe's $20 million payday: "Yes, sir." A possible scenario,... More >>

  • Deus ex Machina

    published November 6, 2003

    A not terribly long time ago in an uninhabitable galaxy called Burbank, a generally astute movie studio founded by four Polish siblings alienated... More >>

  • Ryan's Hope

    published October 30, 2003

    Remember that silly little-girl version of Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally, snuffling "I'm difficult!" through a charming tantrum? Well,... More >>

  • Love and Death

    published October 23, 2003

    Sometimes something so wonderful appears on the big screen that I want to leap up like a shameless non-professional and hug it. Such is the case... More >>

  • Saint Veronica

    published October 16, 2003

    Veronica Guerin isn't at all a bad movie, and some kind things will be said about it here. But cynical appraisal also has its place,... More >>

  • Diaper Dreams

    published October 2, 2003

    You gotta love John Sayles. No, really--you gotta, or else a mob of indie-minded cineastes will club you into submission. Sometimes it's... More >>

  • Greetings to the New Brunette

    published September 25, 2003

    Recently, ornithologists in Antarctica made a startling discovery: Female emperor penguins, being forced against their wills to endure stern... More >>

  • Ad-libbing on Tokyo Time

    published September 18, 2003

    Visualize Tokyo. Got it? Now add popular favorite Bill Murray doing his "lovable schmoe" shtick. Toss in American Rhapsody's up-and-comer... More >>

  • Creeping Crud

    published September 11, 2003

    Once upon a time there was a guy named Sam Raimi. He grew up in Michigan and made amateur horror movies. He stuck with his hobby, and now he's a... More >>

  • Angst in Their Pants

    published September 4, 2003

    Most will deny it, but inside every grown man lurks a hypersensitive adolescent girl. Allow me to tell you all about mine and to share some of my... More >>

  • Below the Law

    published September 4, 2003

    It seems like everybody's raving up Mexican cinema these days--either as a merit badge of self-conscious hipness, or because the stuff is... More >>

  • London Underground

    published July 31, 2003

    It's a great pleasure to behold a chunk of art that's both dank and fresh at the same time, and this appraisal perfectly fits the superb... More >>

  • He, Fellini

    published July 24, 2003

    Everyone in his right mind loves Donald Sutherland. The spry 67-year-old boasts one of the most respectable acting résumés this side... More >>

  • Reduced-Salt Dogs

    published July 10, 2003

    To prepare for reviewing Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl, I did the obvious research: I watched... More >>

  • I Am Siam

    published July 10, 2003

    If, in keeping with current fads, you seek movies featuring females kicking a bunch of ass, your appetite will be tended (and cultivated) at the... More >>

  • Sidestep of the Machines

    published July 3, 2003

    Much like "hilarious Islamic comedy" or "sublime Affleck picture," the term "terrific second sequel" isn't bandied about too much. Name one. Took... More >>

  • The Young Girl and the Sea

    published July 3, 2003

    Once in a while a film comes along that is as sound, smart, sweet and significant as can be, and Whale Rider is such a film. Fault... More >>

  • The Young Girl and the Sea

    published June 26, 2003

    Once in a while a film comes along that is as sound, smart, sweet and significant as can be, and Whale Rider is such a film. Fault... More >>

  • The Pain in Spain

    published May 22, 2003

    French putz Xavier (Romain Duris) is depressed. The poor guy lives in Paris, has Amélie's Audrey Tautou as a girlfriend, eats... More >>

  • Violent Femmes

    published May 1, 2003

    At some fast-approaching point in pop-culture evolution, we're due to hit Total Outsider Saturation, wherein everybody is an outsider and... More >>

  • Mighty Mediocre

    published April 17, 2003

    Just to admit this up front, my ideal concept of musical comedy involves Bryan Adams and Dave Matthews garroting each other onstage with their own... More >>

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