Best Shoddy Legal Advice (2003)
Dallas Police Department
Over the summer, one of our writers was in a car accident. The woman driving the other vehicle was not only at fault, she was driving without insurance or a license. It's not that she had forgotten them; she didn't have them--period. To make matters more complicated, she didn't speak English. When a DPD officer finally arrived on the scene (45 minutes and two 911 calls later), he refused to write a police report, saying only that he "didn't have to." The reporter asked again, saying it would make him feel better, considering that the other driver, having no identification whatsoever, could disappear into the night. "Listen," the officer replied, "I don't have to do the paperwork if no one is injured, so I'm not going to do it. That's it." Not completely unsympathetic, the officer offered a suggestion: "This is what you do. You sue her." The reporter told the officer that he wasn't injured, that he only wanted his car fixed. "So what?" the officer responded. "Sue her anyway." Nice.