The Master Cleanser: Day 5

Status: Green

Weight: 161.5 (-9.6)

Mood: Crazy Caustic Content

One of the benefits of losing weight is gaining time.

When you stop eating - 5 days and counting - you realize exactly how much time we devote each day to food. The planning. The shopping. The commuting. The waiting. The cooking. The eating. The drinking. The digesting. The more eating. The cleaning.

On The Master Cleanser I've not only lost nine pounds, but I'm estimating I've gained two hours per day in free time. Surely you've noticed the glutton of blog items this week?

Of course, I'm also saving money.

My initial expenditure - lemons, salt, fruit juicer, syrup - was $39. I've since bought another dozen lemons, upping my grand total to $44. In other words, the same amount I'd typically spend on a night at restaurant for dinner/drinks.

Physically, I'm a little draggy today. Maybe because I got only five hours' sleep, or maybe because I haven't bitten into anything in about 108 hours. Psychologically I'm fine, stubbornly satisfied to exist in the netherland between rabid hunger and an eternal lemonade stand.

I'm becoming adept at shot-gunning the sea-salt water without gagging. The laxative tea has become a nice change-of-pace taste to the lemonade. I can actually see how people have lasted three weeks, even 40 days.

Look, I know I'm starting to sound like an infomercial for this lemonade diet. But it's an honest-to-goodness, no-agenda experiment. I'm not secretly in one of those Master Cleanser pyramid schemes where I need to trick five other schmoes into buying the book to make it to the next level.

I'm just being truthful. Other than an occasional "Damn, I'd like a greasy cheeseburger and a cold beer" craving, I've yet to see a downside.

Of course, I'm only halfway home. - Richie Whitt

Day 1  Day 2  Day 3  Day 4


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