Oh, those crazy Chick-Fil-A cows. Whether they hold up kooky signs with badly spelled pleas for their lives or dress up in cute outfits to elicit mercy from potential meat eaters, they ultimately seem to fail at halting the dominance of beef consumption in the United States. If those cows were smart, they'd quit the futile protests and just chill out before sacrificing their sweet, juicy lives to Thursday's Ultimate Cowtown Cookout at Fort Worth's Texas Cowboy Hall of Fame, 128 E. Exchange Ave. This fund-raiser isn't just an opportunity to tear into the perfectly sliced innards of Bessie, though. The dinner begins with a chef's lesson on how to best cook the animal that famously jumped over the moon. Sponsoring company Premium Gold will supply the many pounds of flesh, and joining the cows in their stampede to heaven is a hearty selection of the company's Berkshire Pork product. Entry is $65 and benefits the Tarrant County Junior Livestock Association Scholarship Fund. Cocktails begin at 6:30 p.m. Call 817-882-4700. --Sam Machkovech
New Sensation
3/25
"Excite your palate and learn how to put a fresh twist on common flavor combinations." No, this is not the jacket blurb for the Food Channel's Kama Sutra Guide to Maximizing Your Investments in Sound Oral Hygiene. This is bull. Executive chef David Bull of Austin's Driskill Hotel, to be precise. And he wants to challenge your taste buds by throwing a rap on flavor profiling while showing you how to make perfect creamy risotto and citrus creamsicles armed with lemon bombs. Oh, work those incisors (gentle, gentle, risotto is so sensitive). Mouth roof tingled yet? It's Thursday at 6:30 p.m. at Sur La Table, 4527 Travis St., for $70. Call 214-219-4404. --Mark Stuertz
Let Them Eat Cake
3/29
You've gotten up close and personal with authors with Arts & Letters Live's Distinguished Writers series and enjoyed the local flavor of Texas Bound. Arts & Letters Live Jr. has whet your kids' appetite for literature, and you've marveled at performance art mixed with words in A La Carte. Maybe you've even grabbed the spotlight at the Young Writers Workshop or the Literary Café. Now help Arts & Letters Live continue its quality programming by attending the Laugh Your Lunch Off fund-raiser featuring author Jeanne Ray whose book Eat Cake is the hilarious tale of a woman who celebrates her triumphs and copes with life's tragedies by creating wacky cake recipes. Ray's humorous program is preceded by a lunch buffet and followed by a book signing. It takes place Monday at 11 a.m. at the Dallas Museum of Art, 1717 N. Harwood St. The program is $25, and the buffet is $15. Reservations are required, so call 214-922-1220. --Jay Webb
