Concert Foul No. 14: Amateur Concert Videography
In the words of the great, would-be time traveler Kip Dynamite: We "love technology."
And we do. Let's be honest: Music fans of today have it a bajillionty times better than the generation previous to this current, wireless point in time.
Blogs, mp3s, iTunes, Myspace, Facebook and even email blasts from our favorite bands have set up the modern music geek in such a luxurious fashion that future fanboys and fangirls of the next few decades will laugh with pity at the way we used to only be able to obtain music in a legal fashion. They'll be mystified that the only means there was was for stealing music was to grab a cassette and bolt out of Camelot Music's front door in the hope that the mall security would trip over a spilled Orange Julius sample before catching up with you.
Then, of course, there's YouTube. A plain fact here: YouTube is greatness and is arguably the single largest force of electrical nature in today's mouse-click world of convenience, Google and Facebook be damned. Aside from the videos that we all love to forward to friends and co-workers that have little to no relevance outside of providing a fleeting giggle, YouTube has also proven to be a weapon for those looking to commit Concert Fouls by the boat load.
Yes, Amateur Concert Videographer, this one's for you.
The Amateur Concert Videographer shares the same, outlandish trait that
all other forms of Concert Foul offenders possess -- blatant and
unapologetic inconsideration for their fellow concert goer.
Here's the rub, though: We kinda get it.
Who doesn't want a great clip of their favorite band playing their favorite song? In the pre-Internet age, one used to have to wait for an appearance on late-night television for that. Or maybe an awards show or -- if one was very lucky -- a live VHS release of a concert.
The end goal is understandable. Hell, it's likely shared by many at the show.
Things go wrong for the Amateur Concert Videographer when the Videographer just doesn't know when to quit. This is a very different -- and oftentimes much worse -- act than the offenses of the Multiple Picture Snapper.
The Snapper may take tons of pics, but typically, the camera goes up, blocking the person's view behind them for only a moment, then comes back down harmlessly, giving that person behind them their view of the stage back.
In this day and virtual age, it's tough to imagine there are any concertgoers out there who haven't been an innocent victim of this foul. When the Videographer's arms stretch over his or her head fully, with their camera or phone perched atop their supportive hands, they're officially telling anyone who's view is being blocked by their photography that their ticket and their concert experience is more valuable than everyone else's. It's not only an act of obliviousness; it's an act of extreme superiority. A packed, sold-out show will force a victim to awkwardly ask the Amateur Videographer to give their filming a rest, or to simply accept the fact that the spot they showed up early to get isn't quite as awesome as they first thought it was.
Perhaps the most heinous aspect of all of this is in the way that the video being shot will likely amount to little more than fuzzy, static-y blobs of light with sound to match. In the concert world, such an offense is equivalent to holding up the guard at Fort Knox with a AK-47, only to scamper away with the guard's plastic Swatch watch.
So, Amateur Concert Videographer, the next time you push the power button on your camera as you aim to shoot your favorite tune, just try to enjoy the mental picture that you'll be able to enjoy -- along with the people behind you, who will now be able to see the show as well.
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