Right now, everything in Dallas feels a little sweeter. Hydrangeas are blooming. Cats are hugging dogs. Your mom is humming "Step By Step" as she puts her "do me" makeup on. Tornadoes are humping each other. And it's all for one reason: The New Kids on the Block are coming to Dallas.
When the New Kids on the Block begin to perform at American Airlines Center on Thursday night, a Memory Vortex will open up, and all women ages 34 to 50 will be transported to 1989. They will remember exactly where they were and what they were wearing when they first heard "You Got It (The Right Stuff)." And then, the Ultimate Lady Jam will occur.
Moms will throw their briefs and support bras on stage. A New Kid will sexily run his hands through his hair plugs at you whilst body rolling. A coworker will proudly mouth the words of "Popsicle" at you, expecting you to know them, and you will nod your head with enthusiasm, drink your beer, and wonder what ever happened to jortveralls (overalls with jean shorts, duh) and those shoelaces that are all curled up from the '80s that make it so you don't ever have to learn how to tie your shoes.
But let's not just keep guessing what the concert atmosphere at Thursday night's NKOTB concert (featuring TLC and Nelly -- yes, TLC and Nelly) will be when real commentary about the shows can be found online. We're not talking about reviews of the show written by magazines or newspapers. Journalists are biased and boring. We're talking about real deal, straight-up, "we lived through it" truths about the NKOTB concert in other cities. We want the most serious reviewers, with the most serious opinions. We give you: reviews of the NKOTB show from the Ticketmaster comments section.
Apparently, there will be screaming.
Donnie might be drunk?
Maybe there will be audience kissing!
It might be terribe.
It will be better than seeing The Pointer Sisters.
It will be a night to remember.
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