Our Dearest Domingo:
You've had a good run for Congress. You made it out of a crowded, 11-person scrum into a mano-a-mano face off with State Rep. Marc Veasey of Fort Worth. You had the balls to call GM's gas-guzzling SUVs "not good for America," even though the plant that builds so many of them employs a lot of people in the district you hope to represent. Your mustache alone will bag a couple thousand votes on the low end. You like my inane post about how to woo the hipster vote.
We can get behind all of that, especially the mustache, so you know we're speaking as a friend when we tell you this. Not that you're probably going to lose -- that's becoming increasingly clear as your opponent racks up endorsements and rakes in cash. The thing is, over the past couple of weeks, there's been an odor, acrid and discomfiting, like burned coffee and rotten eggs, trailing your campaign. It grew stronger last week when you sent out the press release pretending to be your dog. It tickled us, the thought of your terrier's paws deftly typing a lengthy, grammatically correct endorsement, then managing to send it to your entire email list, but it also made us a little sad because let's be honest. We all know a human typed that letter and there's something a little nauseating about a person pretending to be a dog.
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It wasn't until this morning, though, that we managed to put our finger on the precise source of the stench. It's desperation.
On Friday, you posted on your website that civil rights icon and all-purpose rabble rouser the Rev. Al Sharpton was coming to Dallas on your behalf. The reverend's crew quickly swatted that claim aside.
Sharpton is in town today to promote early voting, decidedly not to stump for you. Yet you're still beating the same drum. Do you really think Photoshopping yourself next to Sharpton on a campaign poster is going to change things?
We're not saying throw in the towel. The fight's still on, and the election's looking to be competitive. It's just that you're not doing yourself any favors by touting the endorsement of your dog or pretending you're best buds with Al Sharpton when you're not. It makes people notice that odor and wonder if your campaign is swirling down the toilet.