Kill Me. Kill Me Now.
Now it's gonna be Lindsay Lohan playing Lucy Ewing in the big-screen Dallas. No, wait, Jessica Simpson. No, wait, Lindsay Lohan. No, wait, I DO NOT GIVE A DAMN. Though, clearly, I do. Especially when there's (the rumor of) a let's-take-it-outside catfight involved. --Robert Wilonsky
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss Observer's biggest stories.