Really, I think we can all do without a little Terrell Owens these days; it's 104 out, last thing I wanna think about's football. Wake me in November. Till then, you can read this Sports Illustrated Web site story about precisely why Owens finally got his ass back to practice yesterday after he took two weeks to heal his hammy and ride a stationary bike and turn himself into a spectacle even from the sidelines. Coach Bill Parcells ain't taking too kindly to the piece, comes word from Oxnard; ESPN's Ed Werder asked him about it, and Parcells told him he wasn't gonna address it. Guess The Tuna didn't like what Michael Silver had to report from straining camp:
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SHOW ME HOW
"SI.com has learned that the previous afternoon, during the team's training-camp practice in Oxnard, Calif., Cowboys coach Bill Parcells approached trainer Jim Maurer and pointedly said, 'Look, you tell Terrell that tomorrow I want him out here for practice. Tomorrow's the day. I don't care. Tomorrow's the day.'
Apparently, Owens got the message, rejoining his teammates on the field Wednesday afternoon for the first time since Aug. 2. And, equally important, Parcells sent a message to his players that he remains firmly in charge of his team.
'Before T.O. got back out there, a lot of people were starting to second-guess Bill,' one Cowboys player says. 'For the first time ever, he'd shown a little weakness, like he might not be totally in control, and like he didn't know how to handle this situation. Because, let's face it, it's been a total spectacle so far.'"
So, so much for being a team player; I believe the sports term for Owens' behavior is "douchy." Who had two weeks into camp as the over-under for an Owens-Parcells showdown? You win. In other sports news, our old pal John Gonzalez, who apparently moved to Boston or something, wants to know:
"Why haven't you guys posted about the girl fight between the Rangers and Angels? I don't think I've seen two men swing so effeminately since [FrontBurner's Tim] Rogers and I went at it before the media league basketball game. The situation demands to be addressed/lampooned."
Hey, looks like Major League Baseball just suspended Rangers manager Buck Showalter for four games, pitcher Vicente Padilla for five and pitcher Scott Feldman for six. How often does a guy named "Feldman" get suspended from anything other than Hebrew school? God bless. Thanks for playing. --Robert Wilonsky