The Over/Under On Parade-Related Arrests Today Is 12. Place Your Bets, Please.
Still an hour to go before the parade officially commences, and ... man, a Bud does sound good right about now.
Photo by Leslie Minora
As you might have heard, just a few folks have skipped work to hang out in downtown today to pay homage to a group of very tall men (and one of-average-height Puerto Rican). But with an hour to go, traffic's an issue: Dallas PD reports that the Jefferson Street Viaduct from Oak Cliff into downtown has been closed off, and "traffic's at a stand-still at Market and Young." And, man, just look at Victory Park. Still, in theory, it should be a festive, loving affair, a few hours of high-fives and woo-hoos and maybe some of those cool flying hip-bump things that athletic people do.
In practice, of course, things may not be as peaceful, as the other night exhibited.
Police are obviously going to do their best to keep things calm and stay that way themselves, but that many people in that small a place, even when they're all channeling a giant German Buddha, tend to bump into each other.
So, Friends of Unfair Park: How many people will wind up in cuffs? Will it mimic 1993's Super Bowl parade, when all hell broke loose? (Not likely; those people weren't busy Tweeting). Or will it be more like last year's San Francisco Giants victory parade, where only a few folks got arrested. (Not likely; those people were all really, really high.)
The Unfair Park Sportsbook has placed the over/under at 12 arrests. Will there be more or fewer? Place your bets in the comments, please. Correct bettors can become part of Wilonsky's official team of head shavers.
Get the Weekly Newsletter
Our weekly feature stories, movie reviews, calendar picks and more - minus the newsprint and sent directly to your inbox.
- House Scrambles to Allow Concealed Handguns on Campuses
- Dallas Needs a Ton of Cash to Fix Obsolete Traffic Signals
- Helpful Hint If You Are In a Flood and Totally Screwed: Try Not To Be There.