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U.N. Swears it Has No Plans to Invade Lubbock County

Lubbock County Judge Tom Head is raising taxes just in case, steeling himself for the U.N. invasion that will almost certainly follow an Obama win in November. But what is the U.N. doing to get ready for its occupation of Lubbock? Maybe buying some Red Raider gear to fit in with the locals? Stocking up on Lone Star? Training interpreters in Texan?

Reuters reports that the international body is doing nothing of the sort. Not even planning to invade, in fact.

The United Nations scoffed on Friday at claims by a judge in Lubbock County, Texas, that U.N. troops could invade the southern U.S. state to settle a possible civil war, which the judge warned could be sparked if Obama is re-elected in November.

"It's absolutely ridiculous," said U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon's spokesman, Martin Nesirky, when asked if the United Nations had any plans to invade Texas.

But isn't that exactly what the U.N. would say if they were planning a super-secret attack? I'd keep your eyes peeled, Judge Head. Those foreigners are crafty devils


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