"Sister Christian" is the Citizen Kane of songs about a skanky teenage girl coming of age. But as with most artistic expression, the lyrics' message is still open to debate and interpretation. This is why Jesus invented the internet. We visited lyricinterpretations.com to find some alternate takes on the true meaning of "Sister Christian." One interpreter posts, "This song was written at the height of the gas crisis. The Christian 'sister' of the title has obviously met Mr. Right, but he lives in another state. She can't afford a plane ticket, however, because jet fuel prices are just too high. She decides to drive—she's motorin', because her price for flight and finding Mr. Right is prohibitive." Sweet sexy Moses, we wish this were true. And if the energy crisis he refers to had taken place in 1983, instead of 1973, then there may be something to this interesting, if historically inaccurate theory. Another poster's keen interpretation that "this song is about smoking crack" must also be ruled out for... More >>>