Wait. You knew that man and dinosaur walked the earth hand-in-talon, right? Happened about 6,000 years ago? "And on the fifth day God created dinosaurs and on the sixth He made man to rideth upon them."? Well how exactly do you explain these fossil things that keep turning up? I recommend you watch this series of educational films. And get your ass to the Creation Museum.
Sure, the five-year-old Mecca cathedral of evangelical revisionism Truth is in Kentucky, but once your impressionable young one catches sight of the billboard above, or whichever of the 20 variations will go up along Interstate 30 at Ferguson Road, you'll have no choice, because kids go batshit for dinosaurs.
(Quick aside: Houston is getting three dino billboards to Dallas' one. Does that mean we're less or more Godly?)
As the Associated Press explains, the billboards are part of a nationwide campaign to lure visitors to the museum to gawk at animatronic dinosaurs and learn that the giant reptiles were created a few thousand years ago.
Answers in Genesis, the museum's parent organization, refers to these as "biblical truths."
Of course, in its quest for balance, the AP dutifully throws in a competing perspective.
Paleontologists say fossil evidence shows dinosaurs were present on the earth tens of millions of years ago, well before humans arrived. Science educators that have long criticized the museum and said the Creation Museum's campaign is meant to attract young people interested in dinosaurs to a place that delivers a religious message and a version of history that conflicts with scientific findings.
A right-thinking commenter on AiG president Ken Ham's Facebook page helps set the record straight: "Some of us are also critical of science educators who can't tell the difference between their field and history."
Bam! Case closed.