Chuck Norris

Think Ink

Top 100 Reasons Texas Is Twice as Awesome as Any Other State

Merritt MartinOh, you can damn well bet this is on the list.​By now most of you dear readers are well aware of the Gawker-produced list of the 50 Worst States In America. Gawker placed their home base at 50, and the Lone Star State at 13. Sure sure, our placement could be worse, but instead of ... More >>

A Dispatch From the Frisco In-N-Out, Where Hundreds Wait in Line For Food, Animal-Style

Photos by Alice Laussuade​Here's the scene at you-know-where: Hundreds of people are in line. Guys in In-N-Out uniforms (plus that shitty hat) direct drive-thru traffic. A refrigerated 18-wheeler sits outside, full of back-up meats. If you are one of the hundreds who are in town, dying for a ... More >>

Paul: Too Many Sci-Fi References, Not Enough Kristen Wiig.

Photos by Alice Laussuade​Here's the scene at you-know-where: Hundreds of people are in line. Guys in In-N-Out uniforms (plus that shitty hat) direct drive-thru traffic. A refrigerated 18-wheeler sits outside, full of back-up meats. If you are one of the hundreds who are in town, dying for a ... More >>

As If We Need To Tell You, Avoid These Candies On Valentine's Day. Seriously.

Consult Dr. Chuck Norris before giving anyone modified candy dispensers on Valentine's day.​Valentine's Day is a zero-sum game. And I say that as someone who loves Valentine's Day, as someone who knows terms like "Hallmark holiday" and "Singles Awareness Day" are just the protests of the unhappy a ... More >>

Governor Rick Perry Joins the Party in Garland for the Big Announcement, At Long Last: Chuck Norris, Texas Ranger

Photos by Patrick MichelsChuck Norris shows off his new badge, flanked by Governor Rick Perry and Aaron Norris, and, second from left, Texas Rangers chief Tony Leal.​The toughest room in Texas today was a plain white conference room in Garland along Interstate 30, down the hallway in the Texas Dep ... More >>

Do It Live: Austin City Limits, Day Two

All photos by Patrick MichelsGrace Potter​For more photos from Friday, check out our slideshow.  In about half-an-hour, the Temper Trap will cause pelvises to thrust, Monsters of Folk will be thirty minutes from their beastly (two hour) set, and in about an hour LCD Soundsystem will be pluggi ... More >>

News & Notes: Lost Society Closed, Dallas Police Warn to "Watch Your Car," Doug's Gym Feted

Brightman Nwatu​That's quite the hodgepodge. Nonetheless, to the briefs ...Avi Adelman, first to the story despite what you read elsewhere, brings the latest news concerning Lost Society on Lower Greenville Avenue: The landlords have done put a padlock on the place. And that's not all: Co-owner Br ... More >>

It's Elemental, Really

Brightman Nwatu​That's quite the hodgepodge. Nonetheless, to the briefs ...Avi Adelman, first to the story despite what you read elsewhere, brings the latest news concerning Lost Society on Lower Greenville Avenue: The landlords have done put a padlock on the place. And that's not all: Co-owner Br ... More >>

Conan O'Brien, Meet Dallas (and Dirk Nowitzki)

Ryan Conlin ​A moment after fluffy-haired beat-box comic Reggie Watts left SMU's McFarlin Auditorium Thursday night, a video clip flickered briefly on the screen behind him: Walker, Texas Ranger -- welcome back, old friend. There was this Andy Richter intro, in which he warned: "Tonight, the part ... More >>

Over The Weekend: Owl City, Paper Route and Hot Chelle Rae at The Venue Formerly Known As Nokia Theatre

Owl City, Paper Route, Hot Chelle RaeNokia Theatre Verizon Theatre, Grand PrairieSaturday, April 17, 2010Better than: Having my daughter hear from her middle-school friends about how totally awesome Owl City was, and how she missed the BEST SHOW EVER OMG!!! Pamela Littky​Rarely have an artist and ... More >>

This Week In Dallas Music History: Walker, Texas Ranger Finds A Killer On Baboon's Tail, Kinda.

​Before Chuck Norris became a meme joke among bored nerds and college students, he roundhouse-kicked Texas criminals while serving as the titular character in Walker, Texas Ranger. And that show served up at least one memorable moment for the DFW music scene in 1996: Walker, Texas Ranger's final S ... More >>

See, It Isn't Only Latte-Sippin' NPR Listeners Who Read New York Times Op-Eds

'Bout a month ago, we mentioned Chuck Norris's column in which he kinda, sorta suggested that just maybe it was time he ran for president of Texas. A sentence from that piece -- in which Norris wondered, "Will history need to record a second American Revolution?" -- prompted this Charles Blow New Yo ... More >>

Contrary to Popular Belief, America is Not a Democracy. It Is a Chucktatorship.

You'll no doubt recognize the headline as one of Chuck Norris's favorite Chuck Norris Facts. Which I don't mention solely because today happens to be Walker, Texas Ranger's 69th birthday, but because of a freshly minted Chuck-penned essay on the conservative Web site World Net Daily. It was forwarde ... More >>

Still Missing Red Jacket? Well, Check This: There's Gonna Be A Reunion

You'll no doubt recognize the headline as one of Chuck Norris's favorite Chuck Norris Facts. Which I don't mention solely because today happens to be Walker, Texas Ranger's 69th birthday, but because of a freshly minted Chuck-penned essay on the conservative Web site World Net Daily. It was forwarde ... More >>

Nintendo's Wii Fit Ignites Yet Another Fitness Fad

You'll no doubt recognize the headline as one of Chuck Norris's favorite Chuck Norris Facts. Which I don't mention solely because today happens to be Walker, Texas Ranger's 69th birthday, but because of a freshly minted Chuck-penned essay on the conservative Web site World Net Daily. It was forwarde ... More >>

Tony Romo is "Fearless"

You'll no doubt recognize the headline as one of Chuck Norris's favorite Chuck Norris Facts. Which I don't mention solely because today happens to be Walker, Texas Ranger's 69th birthday, but because of a freshly minted Chuck-penned essay on the conservative Web site World Net Daily. It was forwarde ... More >>

Do Legal Immigrants Turn in Illegal Ones?

You'll no doubt recognize the headline as one of Chuck Norris's favorite Chuck Norris Facts. Which I don't mention solely because today happens to be Walker, Texas Ranger's 69th birthday, but because of a freshly minted Chuck-penned essay on the conservative Web site World Net Daily. It was forwarde ... More >>

Chuck Norris Doesn't Sleep. He Waits For You, James Brasher.

You'll no doubt recognize the headline as one of Chuck Norris's favorite Chuck Norris Facts. Which I don't mention solely because today happens to be Walker, Texas Ranger's 69th birthday, but because of a freshly minted Chuck-penned essay on the conservative Web site World Net Daily. It was forwarde ... More >>

Arresting Development

You liked Shaun of the Dead? Then Hot Fuzz will bust a cap in your arse

Baboon's Still Kickin' it on Walker, Texas Ranger

You liked Shaun of the Dead? Then Hot Fuzz will bust a cap in your arse

Tubal Migration

TV brings big Break, hot Lights to Dallas actors; plus, theater's best 10 of 2006

Chuck's Children

Norris KICKSTARTs our hearts

Austin, Condensed

Why attend 1,400 concerts when you can read an abbreviated list instead?

Drinking on the Blog

Why attend 1,400 concerts when you can read an abbreviated list instead?

Adios to the Arbor

Two former music editors weigh in on the future of Trees

World Series

Two former music editors weigh in on the future of Trees

Fall in Step

Two former music editors weigh in on the future of Trees

Grape Escape

Go ahead and stomp

List o'Plenty

Plus: Mo' Mavs

Star Bright

Plus: Gimme Some Skin; Dude, You Owe Us, Like, $304

Best Chef Comeback

Matthew Antonovich, Sipango

Sit, Stay

Fetch some cash for our four-pawed furry friends

Toss It Outback

Kangaroo Jack is a real punch in the pouch

Big Picture

The stars align in Las Colinas

Stalking Texas Ranger

Fact or fiction? A Texas author claims Chuck Norris left him stranded in Moscow.

Testing Patience

A gun-toting fugitive gets a hand from Chuck Norris, while a father waits for help from anywhere

Eat these words

The Dallas scene was everywhere -- and nowhere -- in 1999

Ask the Guru

The Met's Bad Habits

Hash Over

The Met's Bad Habits

Hash Over

The Met's Bad Habits

Night & Day

April 1-7, 1999

Running hooch

Quick, someone call Walker, Texas Ranger -- there may be bootlegging going on

Hash Over

Quick, someone call Walker, Texas Ranger -- there may be bootlegging going on

Up in smoke

Lone Wolf fracas sees partners exit in a huff

Hash Over

Lone Wolf fracas sees partners exit in a huff

Hash Over

Lone Wolf fracas sees partners exit in a huff

Stogie's last gasp?

Lone Wolf sends it off with class and taste

Rocker, Texas Ranger

Baboon kicks Chuck Norris' ass in a Deep Ellum club...sort of

Buzz

Baboon kicks Chuck Norris' ass in a Deep Ellum club...sort of