Bacon is a cat. Lee Harvey's is a bar. Kaz is Bacon's keeper and Lee Harvey's social media authority. Bacon recently took an unannounced odyssey, leaving nothing but conspiracies in his wide, panicked wake. A well known local music critic, no one understood why Bacon would give up his fat, lazy, lush cat-life for greener pastures. After a search that included night-vision goggles, pet psychics, and masses of frazzled followers, praise Hosanna, Bacon was found.
Here's what we know (and don't) after an interview with Kaz.
What's the story on Bacon? Bacon showed up as a scrawny, dirty, hungry kitten at Lee Harvey's in 2005. They were feeding him food from the kitchen (his favorite was bacon) and he just started living there. Bacon lived at the bar until about 2008, when we decided he should "retire" and live with me. For a while, I would still take him up to the bar for special events and visits. He doesn't like that anymore.
Over the years, he has become like a grandpa to all the ferals in my neighborhood. (My neighbor and I have trapped and fixed them all, by the way. Bacon was fixed soon after he showed up at the bar.) How does Bacon bide his time now? Bacon's favorite thing now is holding court on our front porch. The other cats look up to him as both a father figure and as Fonzie. He wants to be on the porch all the time during the day (he comes in at night). Most of my neighbors on the block and around the area know him and love having a celebrity neighbor.
Does he run off often? Is he the neighborhood scoundrel? He rarely leaves the porch because he's pretty lazy, plus he does not like being too far away from his food bowl. When we noticed on Friday night that he wasn't around and ready to come in to bed, we started looking, but figured that he was passed out in someone's flowerbed. We looked EVERYWHERE all weekend and really started to freak out. Friends were coming over and helping put fliers (over 400) on every single doorknob. They also helped us talk to people and get permission to search their backyards and sheds.
When did you really start to worry? By Monday, I knew I had to get it online. One guy brought his night vision goggles and went down all the alleys. Many people out of state offered reward money.
Night vision goggles are pretty intense. Any other tools? Drones? I had been in close contact with a friend of mine who's a pet psychic. She was having a hard time connecting to him because she was too emotionally involved, since she's loved him all his life. All of my dog-walker friends were looking for him while working. One of them stopped by my house one day and said, "Don't think I'm weird, but I used to be a pagan. Let me give you some visualization techniques." They were a lot like the ones that my psychic was telling me.
Serious. Another friend of mine is an author and editor at Haye House Publishing. She personally knows all those people like Louise L. Haye, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Lisa Williams, etc. She had some of them involved with visualizing Bacon coming home.
Bananas. Did it work? By Wednesday, things came to fevered pitch, since the cold front was coming in that night. At that point, I was getting a ton of calls. The other volunteers were still scouring the neighborhood and alleys, and even smelling around just in case.
It never hurts to smell around. I personally, think that it was the collective thoughts and prayers that connected to the universe. On my Facebook page, I even said, "I'm not above asking for hippie help. Do whatever you believe in to think about him. Pray to St. Francis, visualize a light beam coming out of my house, be the blade of grass he's sniffing, stare at the pictures of him on the porch."
I know this might sound silly because he's one cat and animals are missing every day. But this guy has touched so many lives and has thousands of fans.
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SHOW ME HOW
Not at all. None of us were thinking any of this sounded silly. On Wednesday afternoon, after coming back from a wild goose chase at Dallas Animal Services (not their fault, great place), I continued to get calls. One of them was from a lady named Erica Warfield. She was certain she had seen him. By this time, I had a really good idea about JUST HOW MANY tuxedo cats walk around Junius Heights.
One can only imagine. It was him. He had wandered about 6 blocks away by an elementary school. I walked up, hoping that it was him, looked at his face for his birthmark, and said, "You little fucker! You have no idea how many people are freaking out over you!"
I had, just an hour before, talked to Seth Smith (the owner of Lee Harvey's). He was ready to get Channel 8 involved.
Naturally. So, what inspired Bacon to traverse the universe? I'll never know why Bacon started his Odyssey (that's what I'm calling it). Had he been secretly reading my old college copies of Homer's epic poems? Had he been following some of the parents and kids that walk down my street to that school? Did he get a side job as a crossing guard? I hope not, because he's NOT SUPPOSED TO CROSS THE STREET!