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"I say, if you work behind a bar and serve drinks, call yourself a bartender; it is perfectly descriptive and free of any pretense. Would you call a skilled trash collector a trashologist?" (Andrew Knowlton of Bon Appetit magazine, responding to the precious trend classifying those who shake cocktails as 'mixologists' or 'bar chefs', just because they create things bartenders used to create. Couldn't agree more.)