Handshakes And Sissy Slaps

Just our way of saying congrats (or otherwise) to people in general...

People we'd like to shake hands with:

  • Our own Patrick Michels, who designs graphic art for Pairing Off, contributes occasional stories, takes pictures and keeps the blog afloat through his technical know-how. He earned a finalist slot in the annual alternative weekly journalism awards for a story he wrote while at the Texas Observer. In fact, think we'll all go shake his hand right now.
  • Jeff Sinelli, for grabbing a ton of media attention simply by opening a burger joint.
  • Lon Burnam, because of his vote in the Texas state legislature against official praise for W and his "presidency."
  • Those men and women who died in America's wars, officially declared or otherwise--in particular, the men of the 504th PIR (82nd Airborne) who carried an assault over the Waal River on September 20, 1944, Marines of the 1st division who fought on Peleliu, the...well, we could go on and on.

People we'd like to sissy slap:

  • Nancy Pelosi. Before we thought she was just a harmless walking skeleton. But now...perhaps we should be in awe of her backpedal. Nancy, just shut up and we'll all be better off.
  • Dick Cheney. Same goes for the creepmeister. So, Dick--closing Guantanamo would be an act of "recklessness"? Well, what about the illegal invasion of another country, huh? How 'bout detaining people with no plan for what to do with them after the war? Shut up, as well, you old...um, better watch ourselves. He's still out of his cage and on the loose.

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