How 'Bout Them Knockers: Yumi To Go
Yumi To Go
5200 Lemmon Ave.
Promised delivery time: 25 minutes
Delivered in: 21 minutes
Cojones of phone order guy: 20
Driver beating the odds: 65
Degree of difficulty: 9 (no one likes driving on Oak Lawn or Maple)
Stoicism of driver: -8
Bonus because he had reason for suspicion: 4
Thai-style chicken skewer: 9
Orange chicken: -1
Total Score: 98
The guy taking my order issued his own challenge. No goading--not even a 'how long' from my end of the conversation.
"Normally it takes us 45 minutes," he said over the phone, "but we can be there in 25."
Granted, it's only 1.5 miles between Yumi To Go and our plush Observer offices--a trip of about 50 seconds in Texas Motor Speedway terms. But you have to take into account the morass of traffic between Lemmon and Rawlins on Oak Lawn or the treacherous construction zones along Maple, if one chooses an alternate route. Often it's quicker to cruise in from the suburbs than to hop from their plot of inside-the-loop real estate.
So any order taker foolhardy enough to promise a 25 minute run has massive whatever is Chinese for cojones...and figures he can hire a replacement delivery driver with little problem.
The driver, in this case, not only lived, but also lived up to the challenge. In fact, he brushed it off casually and delivered the order with extreme efficiency--which makes up for his, shall we say, not overly friendly demeanor. Perhaps prompted by the hovering of our eager web photographer, the driver seemed rather suspicious of the entire affair.
Oh, well. The entire process was uneventful--and that's pretty much all we want from food delivery.
Now, as for the food itself...Can't say enough in praise of the Thai chicken skewers. Although it really amounts to a loose interpretation of backyard Bangkok barbecue, the charred peanut sauce lends a crusty, bittersweet patina to the meat. Three breast pieces sit on a bed of cold noodles ladled with a peanut broth, as well--so the flavors mesh nicely. Their orange chicken, on the other hand, packs enough citrus to scorch your tongue. Only some wok-seared strips of orange zest break up the monotonous sharpness, adding an acrid background.
At least they use decent ingredients.
One or two little flaws can't stop Yumi To Go from nabbing the top spot in the 2008 'Knockers' standings.
And that's it. Now, as my fortune cookie recommends, I'm going to "prepare for the unexpected." In other words, I'm heading downstairs to await the arrival of a lost and very gullible Sigel's delivery driver.
Get the Dining Newsletter
The week's top local food news and events, plus interviews with chefs and restaurant owners, dining tips, and a peek at our print review.