How to Cure a Hangover in Dallas

The Anvil has the cure for ails you, and also what ails you.
The Anvil has the cure for ails you, and also what ails you.
Courtesy of SusieDrinksDallas

This post marks the end of Drinking Week here at City of Ate, where we spent the week drooling over Dallas' best cocktails, learning the secrets of the cocktail-making trade, professing our love for simple, classic drinks and our disdain for the opposite.

Now, everything hurts. So we asked some of our writers to share their go-to Dallas hangover cures, free to use whenever you wake up with a dry mouth, a blinding headache and one fewer credit card in your wallet.

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How to Cure a Hangover in Dallas
Scott Reitz

Beef Fajitas and a Margarita I classify hangovers into one of three categories so I can handle them properly. The lowest level hangover requires minimal remediation. I usually pound a glass or two of water in the early morning hours, and subsequently sleep in. In essence, I snooze the pain away, and this worked well while I was younger but is beginning to fail me.

Mid-tier hangovers occur when your sticky eyelids peel back sometime afternoon and instead of feeling better, you feel much worse. On these days I do my best and walk to the nearest 7-Eleven and fill a super-double-big-whatever with fountain Coke, and pull hard on the straw. This is when I start hunting for breakfast tacos, which can be more or less difficult depending on how late I slept in.

For the worst of the worst hangovers -- the kind that laughs at breakfast tacos and soda, only to respond with increased nausea -- I pull out the last tools I have at my disposal. If it's past 6 p.m. and I still feel like shit (a phenomenon that I'm encountering more and more as I age) I make haste to a Tex-Mex restaurant, (Mariano's is a favorite) and order queso, beef fajitas and a margarita.

I have never encountered a hangover that can stand up to this triple threat, and I am a man who is prone to hangovers that last for days. I'm convinced the cheese coats my stomach and the grease in the beef soothe me, while the onions and peppers trick my brain into thinking I'm doing something healthy for myself. That margarita? Well we've all heard that thing about the hairy dog, but either way I've never left a Tex-Mex restaurant feeling as good as when I entered it in the broken state of an epic hangover. -- Scott Reitz

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How to Cure a Hangover in Dallas
Nick Rallo

DIY Tacos at The Slow Bone When you have hangover head, one of the worst things to deal with is talking to other people. At Slow Bone, there's no need to say things. Just point and grunt in the cafeteria-style line. Then, sit with your brisket and and black-out good creamy sides (ask for tortillas, if they got 'em) and pile on top with crisp, pickled onions. No words. Just brisket taco. -- Nick Rallo

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The Bloody Mary at Anvil Pub (at top) Sure, the brunch plates are inexpensive, but why bother when for twenty bucks you can have the Sensai of all Bloody Mary's. When you need something to feed the hungry headache, you'll appreciate all that it graces you with: a cheeseburger slider, pickle, asparagus, salami, shrimp and then some. If you prefer sweetness for your cure, the Mimosa is just as ridiculous, topped off with a breakfast Sammy, cinnamon bun, fruit and tots. Insider tip: Get there early and sit at the bar. Table service is kinda slow on a Sunday morning, just like you. -- Teresa Lensch

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The Chopped Liver Sandwich When your brain hurts and you're hungry, I drag yourself to Cindi's or Deli News and order up a chopped liver sandwich. Rye bread, chopped liver, red onion. Maybe a bit of Russian dressing and some crisp lettuce for texture. Turns out there are lots of vitamins and minerals in liver, which helps to make up for what you did to yours the night before. Nothing better than that smooth, meaty richness when you've been hitting the Manischewitz a little too hard. -- foodbitch

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How to Cure a Hangover in Dallas
Catherine Downes

Mudsmith A coffee may seem like the last thing your churning stomach needs, but it might actually help. Even if it doesn't, you're still going to need something to keep you alert enough to power through the weekend, and that's where Mudsmith comes in. An amateur might suggest ordering a fresh-pressed juice or some other healthy shit, but you should really just buy two vanilla lattes made with whole milk and eat as many of their tiny kolaches as you can before the inevitable food/coffee coma. -- Amy McCarthy

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How to Cure a Hangover in Dallas
File photo

Cafe Brazil Cafe Brazil is not so much a hangover cure as it is a hangover prevention. And when I talk about Cafe Brazil, I am mostly talking about the one on Cedar Springs where you can crash after dancing your ass off at the Round Up all night. They serve the greasiest, most delicious breakfast you have ever eaten at 3 a.m. Get the Texas Feast. It includes toast, eggs, bacon, and potatoes that you can deliver straight to your face while still intoxicated. This will ensure you are not frenching the porcelain throne the next morning. They also have endless amounts of coffee and giant glasses of water to help you sober the hell up before you have to figure out how you're going to get home. -- Kelsey Sidwell

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How to Cure a Hangover in Dallas
Catherine Downes

The Cheap Bastard Way Ingredients: 20 Red Gatorades Fried Chicken Mashed Potatoes iPhone

Step 1: Pound all Red Gatorades (The color is crucial. That light purple half-the-calories bullshit Gatorade will do you no good.)

Step 2: Immediately chug all the fried chicken and mashed potatoes that you can at Babe's Chicken Dinner House (in Frisco, AKA North of The Wall, AKA Frisconsin).

Step 3: Scroll through your iPhone and start deleting photos/texting apologies. Do not blame the Four Loko, even though you can absolutely blame the Four Loko. -- Cheap Bastard Alice Laussade

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The Potato Pancakes at Kuby's Kuby's should actually be called "Hey I Ate This Huge Delicious Meal and Now Need a Nap." Maybe that's too long? Maybe just abbreviate it to HIAHDMNNAN, which is the exact sound you make when eating the crispy, addictive potato pancakes. If you're awesome you get them with the toothpaste-tube of sour cream and applesauce. Goodbye hangover head, hello Portlandia-on-quiet-loop-while-I-sleep-with-my-back-to-the-TV. -- Nick Rallo


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