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Mmm. Do I Detect Corn Dog Notes in This Pinot?

Fried peach with your Bellini? Oh hayl yeah.
Fried peach with your Bellini? Oh hayl yeah.
Christi Erpillo

Ho. Lee. Fried garnishes for your cocktails. Christi Erpillo, the supreme mega fried badass who brought us those glorious, award-winning fried peaches in 2009, just gave every wine-box-chugging lady American the only thing she's ever wanted at the fair: wine plus fried.

The photo of these beverages doesn't do the ideas justice. Let me explain to you bev for bev what Erpillo's busting out this year at the fair:

Back row: (left to right)

Bellini with fried peach garnish. (Remember, that's an award-winning fried peach, not just some no-name fried peach.)

Texas Twister (lemonade, pinot grigio Champagne, Sprite) with fried mini corn dog.

Bloody Mary with fried green beans. (Uh, hell-to-the-yes, please.)

Front row:

Chocolais (that's chocolate wine, beetches) with fried brownie bite.

Mimosa with fried bananas Foster bite.

Are these frocktails the official sponsor of Most Eligible Dallas? They're perfectly Texas trailer chic. The only way they could be more Dallas is if Erpillo offered a free pedicure with purchase. I predict that these things will be fried booze crack for the Dallas MILF set. Congrats on being awesome, Erpillo. This not-so-fried fried booze is all kinds of win. Fried cheers.

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