Oh, Thank Heaven! 7-Eleven Gets
In on the Roasted Chicken Act

Move over, Boston Market. There's a new bird in town. 7-Eleven, home of the Slurpee, is adding roasted chicken, for the low, low price of $7.99, to its menu, according to a report in the Chicago Sun-Times. This comes on the heels of the Dallas-based convenience store chain's other new food options, among them rigatoni covered in Alfredo sauce. This means that those poor saps unable to afford a four-star restaurant's tasting menu can have a slumming très chic three-course meal.

For example, an appetizer of cream cheese jalapeños, followed by four-cheese ravioli with marinara and the roasted fowl, finished off with a package of fresh fruit. All of this can be paired with a 24-ounce bottle of crisp, refreshing Game Day Light, the store's brand brewski, which won the gold medal in the American Light Beer category at the 2010 U.S. Open Beer Championships. No kidding.

Unfortunately, the roasted chicken is only available in Chicago. The company calls it testing. It's unknown when it will arrive in the Dallas market (calls to 7-Eleven were not returned), but we're sure when it does, Dude Food will take one for the team and taste this potentially dry, life-threatening poultry.

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