This Super Bowl Sunday, Just Say No To Chicken Wing Delivery

You can do this. I promise, it's easy.
You can do this. I promise, it's easy.

The Super Bowl is coming, which means everyone must think about, write about, talk about and prepare for the egregious consumption of chicken wings. It's a damn shame because most of the wings consumed during the big game will totally blow.

I blame these guys for fucking up chicken wings forever. The National Chicken Council blasts out a report every year correlating the Super Bowl with increased wing consumption, and then news outlets run with story after story that only increases the chicken-wing fervor. And since wings can be a pain to make, and most people like to watch the game at home, delivered wings will comprise the majority of the chicken appendages that are consumed this Sunday.

Which is sad because, in food-expert technical culinary parlance, delivered wings suck.

Pizza places and wing chains typically under-fry their products so they never really crisp up. Delivery methods only make matters worse, since sealed, steamy containers make the skin squishy, and heat not meant for blue cheese dressing yields a warm puddle of unappetizing goo. It's gross. Don't eat them.

Either go out to a bar and get bombed with your wings or cook them at home. It's necessary. There are 745,000 recipes for cooking wings at home, and if you don't like deep frying, you can bake them, which you shouldn't because deep frying is delicious and let's be honest you already blew up your New Year's resolution anyway.

My top recipe pick? This one. I've got Korean fried chicken on the brain and that recipe looks like a damn good one.

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