12 Awesome Things To Do in Dallas This Weekend, March 28 to April 1

That's a scene from the greatest art house film ever, Spaceballs. We at The Mixmaster huffed canned air with our friends at Sundown at Granada and reached a heightened state of transcendence. Once there, Yogurt instructed us to use the Schwartz to throw THE BIGGEST SPACEBALLS PARTY IN THE HISTORY OF DALLAS. (Not including suburbs and surrounding neighborhoods.)

It happens on Monday, and we're handing out $500 prize packs for winners of the Diorama, Costume and much esteemed Best Helmet contest. So air out that Mawg ensemble and party with us.

Until then, here's your weekend guide. Share it with your pals and click the event titles for more information. I'll see you out there. (I'll be the one dressed as a Druish Princess.)

Thursday 3.28 Bruce Vilanch at Rose Room&S4 -- He's been the center cube of the Hollywood Squares, the head writer for the Academy Awards and a personal friend of Whoopie Gooldberg. Also: a fun, potato-shaped comedian. BRUCE!

Andrei Codrescu -- A poet, cultural arbiter and frequent contributor to All Things Considered, this Peabody and Pushcart prize winner shares his wisdom at the Kessler for one, special evening. Yes, that is a VERY BIG DEAL, word nerds.

Justin Terveen's Solo Show at Kettle Art -- Personally, I think Justin Terveen tips NOAA off about changes in weather patterns. It seems that whenever the cohesive skyline gets turbulent, cracked or frayed, he's there to capture its climax. Rich with hue and dense with drama, his photographs show Dallas at its most beautiful. He's our city's personal Glamor Shots, and tonight you'll see his solo show, Urban Fabric. It's the second to last event being held at Kettle Art's landmark Deep Ellum location, so pay your respects and buy a thing.

Friday 3.29 Evil Dead at Texas Theatre -- The reboot is still a week away, so rekindle the flames of your Ash admiration now as Texas Theatre screens the original chainsaw wielding, Raimi, Campbell and Tapert classic, Evil Dead. It's up all weekend long.

Saturday 3.30 Stelarc and Wings of Desire Present a Group Skin Suspension -- Yes, you might pass out watching this piece of performance art. That's to be expected as five humans will be pierced, hung and slowly spun like human laundry. REMEMBER TO BREATH. Take in Stelarc's life work at the kick-off lecture, which includes: Suspensions above various cities; six-legged robots; and an ear implanted in his forearm that will soon be wi-fi enabled. Check back with Mixmaster tomorrow for more about this fascinating human.

Gloria, The 500 Preview, at Conduit Gallery -- It's the newest bash by our favorite artful bashers, Green Bandana, and your $15 ticket includes live music by the Danny Church Band, an open bar and cupcakes. (See why we like them so much?) Also, you get to roam Conduit's current exhibition in wonderful company. It's a must-do.

Circuit 12's One Year Anniversary Party -- Also in the gallery/party spotlight is this event at Circuit 12, which turns one-year young this month. (That's like 7 in gallery years.) They're partnering with Dallas' fashion plate art squad, Caviar Club, for a Sinatra-themed affair, which boasts a full cash bar; DJ sets by Tony Schwa, Trademarx and Taylor Effin Cleveland; Playboy Bunny cocktail waitresses; go-go dancers; a live string duo; a photo booth; and bottle service. Yes, that's a lot to fit in Circuit 12. We're curious also.

Sunset Screenings Return with Searching for Sugar Man: What's not to love about this series? Held in the Arts District, these free, monthly films are now also BYOB. On Saturday, see the film that gobbled up Best Documentary at the Academy Awards as Sunset Screenings kicks off with Searching for Sugar Man.

Third Annual Crawfish for Cancer -- Don't be misled by the title: The folks at Three Sheets are not "for Cancer." In fact, they're so against it that they'll serve up thousands of swamp bugs in order to eradicate it. A $15 donation gets you all day feeding, drink specials and the do-gooder feeling that accompanies partying with intention.

Sunday 3.31 Easter Screening of The Ten Commandments at Texas Theatre -- You know 'em, you love 'em, you break 'em! Let's give it up for the Ten Commandments! What better way to celebrate Easter than with a Charlton Heston beard resurrection? #gloriouslybiblical

The Annual Pooch Parade -- You've grown accustomed to Dallas' well-heeled giving you the up-and-down. Why not humble yourself further by allowing dogs to do the same? Our city's most stylish pups parade through Cedar Springs every Easter in nicer outfits that exist in your closet. Just go with it, it's tradition.

Monday 4.1 April Fool's Day Party with Spaceballs! -- WE'RE EXCITED! It's time to breath life back into the oxygen-depleted Planet Spaceball, so we've paired up with our friends over at Sundown at Granada to throw a party worth of The Schwartz. There will be big prizes for Best Helmet, Best Costume and Best Diorama; a Spaceballs cake; a totally free screening of the film (naturally); and pizza and booze for sale. The film screens at dusk, but get there early if you want anything resembling a chair. This party's going to be off a few dozen chains.

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