16 Awesome Things to Do in Dallas This Weekend, February 28 to March 4

I know what you're thinking: Did I drop acid and step inside of a paint-by-numbers, again? Possibly. Also, Night Comfort! It's Friday's celebration of music video and Beta-era television footage.

What's that Dallas? You'd like dirt track championships, tripped-out musicals on film, Irish Festivals, live comedy, great art AND opera in bars? You drive a hard bargain, but OK.

Click the event titles for more information, and share this list with your adventure posse. I'll see you out there. (I'll be the one aggressively seducing a tenor while gnawing on fried chicken.)

Thursday 2.28 Mark Frauenfelder -- He's the editor of Make Zine, former editor of Wired, contributing writer for the NYT Magazine and a general Professor of DIY Badassery, because that's totally a degree plan, somewhere. He's speaking in Fort Worth tonight, so if you have a question -- any question -- about how stuff works when soldered with other stuff, he'll have your answer.

13 Spectrums -- The group art show blends everything from Nevada Hill's psychedelic silk screens to Christian Millet's kaleidoscopic color treatments. In fact, all 13 participating artists are determined to make your brain jiggle inside your dome piece.

Danny Church Band at the Dram -- We don't often dip into music on this list, but this show is a late announcement. Also, these guys killed it last week, when they served as fashion's live soundtrack at the Pin Show. Check 'em out tonight and feel the sexytime vibes.

Friday 3/1 Paul Reiser at Hyenas -- When y'all watched Mad About You, did you wonder how Reiser could be a documentary filmmaker who never seemed to be working, but could still afford that sweet apartment? Me too. Let's ask him about that while he's trying to do stand-up on Friday. Also "Is Helen Hunt's hair super shiny in real life? ... Paul? ... PAUL?!"

Night Comfort at Texas Theatre -- Remember the first time your parents left you home alone, and you sipped NyQuil from a wine glass while watching music videos and freaky upper-dial ephemera? You'll get that same warm feeling, without the panic-stricken fear of abandonment, at Texas Theatre's bar/dance floor/minimalist arcade area on Friday at Night Comfort.

Gavin Cleaver, our British Friend, Debuts his Stand-up Set at Dallas Comedy House -- If you've been reading my blog, Mixmaster (just nod as though you have), you'd know that our house Brit, Gavin, has been doing a series called Death By Microphone. He's chronicling his experience in stand-up comedy class and his big reveal happens on Friday, at 7:30 p.m. at Dallas Comedy House. -- His thought? "That place is small, few can see me fail." -- My thought? "We aren't afraid to squeeze together at your expense."

Port-A-Cool Dirt Track Championship -- This is more bald eagle than a Miller High Life half-shirt crammed in a Toby Keith I Love this Bar and Grill koozie. Get some, y'all.

Beauty Live at the Galleria -- This glamour buffet runs through Sunday and features make-overs, sessions with hair and cosmetics specialists and the opportunity to try on lots of different beauty brands, so you don't blow cash on eyeshadow that makes you resemble a slutty evil Disney witch.

Armadillo Ale Beer Launch -- Hey Denton! You have beer now! Armadillo Ale releases its first flavor on Friday. It's a little (big) thing called Quakertown Stout. You should go and drink it all.

Saturday, 3/2 Second Annual Dallas Modern Home Tour -- DROOL. If you dig that retro-futuristic look that modern architecture provides, grab a few passes, put on matching socks (these are "shoes off" houses, trust me), and go salivate over the finest examples of home design in the city. Then, hide in a spare closet and forward your mail. You live there now. Ted Kincaid at Talley Dunn Gallery -- He's Dallas' go-to for bafflingly puzzle-like photography. What appears false is likely real and what appears real is likely false, but however you choose to wrap your skull around it, conceptually, the images themselves are stunning. See his classic Thunderhead Clouds and his newer, more hauntingly nocturnal images, at this opening celebration. Badass Dash -- Thankfully, the deadline to register for this has passed, which means if you like paying to be treated like a soldier, you're out of luck. Don't worry, you can still join me on the sidelines. I'll be slowly and methodically eating doughnuts and laughing while these athletic types scamper through an obstacle-laced marathon. Suckers.

Electric Saloon Burlesque and Cabaret -- A gaggle of babes are taking over Rubber Gloves for a night of sweaty seduction. All of your favorites -- One Chance Fancy, Bianca 13, Black Mariah, Frostine Shake, Dura Celle, Lilith Grey, Lyric Laveau and Onyx Fury, and show organizer Honey Cocoa Bordeauxx will be there. Sunday 3.3 North Texas Irish Festival -- Man, remember when you got kicked out of the Irish Festival for doing ecstasy and puking Guinness everywhere? That was '99. You can go back now. They don't remember you. It runs all weekend, from Friday through Sunday.

Tommy, at Texas Theatre -- Tina Turner + Acid Queen = All You Need To Know. (Well, maybe not all: dates are helpful. Catch Tommy from Thursday through Sunday.) Monday 3.4 OPERA SHOTS AT THE FOUNDRY! -- If you like heavy drinking (yep), and opera (yep), and fried chicken (yep), check out Opera Shots on Monday at The Foundry. It's a rad program by the Fort Worth Opera that brings free, live performances into bars. They didn't have to take Opera Shots to Dallas; they're doing it because they're nice and want to share. Join them, and me, as we do "Big O Shots," get sloppy on a Monday, and watch a performance of "Figaro's Last Hangover."

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