Dispatch From Cannes: Cannes Someone Please Get Me A Badge?

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Apologies for not updating you sooner, but things (of course) did not work in my favor when I arrived in France. We were expecting to cover the whole festival, but Gordon and the Whale's sponsor for the festival intended for us to cover only a few films. My associate, Joshua Brunsting, and I spent the first 24 hours in shock that we flew all the way to Cannes only to find our planned coverage very unlikely.

Then, unicorns galloped through a never-ending rainforest, Luke Skywalker defeated Darth Vader, and Armond White never existed: Things started to go our way. I received an email from the Cannes press office after Alex Billington, founder of the movie news site First Showing, informed them of our unfortunate situation. The press office granted us one press badge, which I gave to Joshua because my family was here. As badly as I wanted to cover the festival, it just made sense.

The following day, Tim League, founder of Alamo Drafthouse, Fantastic Fest, and Drafthouse Films, sent me a text saying he could get me a market badge, which is an access pass for major players like film buyers and producers, for 370 euros (roughly $527.36). Without hesitation, I went to the press office and bought the badge. I no longer hated life and could finally see some movies.

My good luck did not end there, though. I got another email from the press office saying they wanted to grant me an official Cannes press badge of behalf of writer/director/stuntman Nash Edgerton. Yes, I had other things in mind as far as our coverage went, but at this point, I wanted to share how touching it was that so many people went out of their way to help us.

So, while all was not lost, at the moment, I only have one review from Cannes on GordonandtheWhale.com, for Lars von Trier's Melancholia, which happens to be my favorite film of the festival. Other reviews from me will follow shortly, but for now, you can read my associates' reviews here.

More to come, movie lovers, so stay tuned.

Irrelevant to any of this, but crucial to my stay here: The French really love McDonald's and Michael Jackson.

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