Drink it: Your Party Guide to Cinco de Mayo in Dallas

Jamie Laughlin May 2, 2013 1:10PM

Do not fret, Dallas and surrounding burbs: The Observer used its highly advanced taco doppler technology to conduct predictive Cinco de Mayo party research. Our data shows that there is a 23 percent chance of hangover on Saturday, but that will increase throughout the weekend, culminating into a 90 percent probability on Monday morning, coupled with a strong likelihood of Phone-In-Sick precipitation. Consider wearing layers.

Now, let's party. I'll see you out there. (I'll be the one inexplicably yelling at the tequila.)

_____________________________

Cinco de Miler Dallas (Saturday) -- Get your workout in early on Saturday so you can have a guilt-free Sunday hangover, and do it in great company at Cinco de Miler, the only race in town that features mariachis cheering you toward the finish line. The goodie bag looks dope, all of the money raised goes to Ronald McDonald House and there's a post-race fiesta where your first beer, churro, chips and salsa and breakfast burritos are on the house.

KEEP THE DALLAS OBSERVER FREE... Since we started the Dallas Observer, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Dallas, and we'd like to keep it that way. With local media under siege, it's more important than ever for us to rally support behind funding our local journalism. You can help by participating in our "I Support" program, allowing us to keep offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food and culture with no paywalls.

Make a one-time donation today for as little as $1.

Jamie Laughlin

Contact: Jamie Laughlin