He’s All That may have been an ill-advised idea, but it’s not entirely wrong to try revamping some of the 1990s canon. Look, we enjoyed She’s All That at the time for its goofy charms, but it's one of the many '90s movies that haven’t aged particularly well. Young hearts may have fluttered at Cooke’s “transformation,” but its message doesn’t quite line up with what’s acceptable today, especially in terms of body positivity.
Hollywood, we have a problem. If we’re going to be force-fed countless remakes anyway, they should at least think of gender-swapping versions of these '90s classics.
Dave is a classic and we love the idea of Kevin Kline as the president of the United States, but we also can’t help but think having the first lady Sigourney Weaver step up to the role would’ve been even better. How cool would it be if our first female commander-in-chief was none other than Ellen Ripley?
Bowfinger’s doubleheader of Steve Martin and Eddie Murphy is a once-in-a-generation union of comedic titans, but the story is straightforward enough that we could see a new generation step into the role of a stressed-out film producer and a troublesome lead star. Perhaps Julia Louis-Dreyfuss and Ali Wong could match forces?
No, no, not the G.I. Joe guy. This was actually an Atlantic City hard-boiled noir set during the backdrop of a professional wrestling match that starred Nicolas Cage. Since Netflix’s GLOW was canceled, we’ve been waiting for another project that spotlights the world of female wrestling.
The Devil’s Advocate
Now, in 2021, can we reflect on how completely bonkers The Devil’s Advocate was? Keanu Reeves as an unlikeable slimy lawyer, complete with a terrible Southern drawl? Al Pacino as the actual devil? Wow. Maybe an Emma Roberts and Glenn Close pairing today could breathe new life into this '90s camp.
Swimming With Sharks
Look, we’re never going to completely take issue with a movie that ends with Kevin Spacey getting tortured and humiliated. However, Swimming With Sharks’ story about the reality of being a powerless Hollywood intern is definitely primed for a female perspective in the #MeToo era.
Pump Up The Volume
Although it probably resonated with us at the time, Christian Slater’s role as the underground high school radio host who offers tough truths to his loyal following is perhaps the most toxic dude-bro in cinematic history. Sorry, Joker. Maybe a new spin from a female writer/director could turn Pump Up The Volume’s male fantasy into something actually profound.
At one point Chris Pine was set to front a retooling as this disguise-wearing gentleman thief, but the shoes left by Roger Moore and Val Kilmer are big ones to fill. You need someone who can disappear into any role and seamlessly pull off any accent, profession, or skill set. Regina King, maybe?
Think about Sylvester Stallone hanging off the side of a mountain trying to fight bad guys at the same time. Now imagine it's Charlize Theron. A step up, isn’t it?