Lipstick and Five O’ Clock Shadows

The Miss America pageant is a strange amalgam of beauty contest and charity event. All of the contestants are incredible citizens of the world, who dedicate their lives to important causes. Oh, who are we kidding? It’s really all about the looks. The ridiculous nature of beauty pageants has been the subject of parody long before Honey Boo Boo (’cause TLC is totally screwing with America, right?). This weekend Uptown Players brings back the ever-popular and utterly excessive musical Pageant. It’s just your run-of-the-mill beauty competition, except all the girls have a little something extra. There are silly songs, high kicks and as a bonus, a new Miss Glamouresse 2014 will be named at every performance. Catch opening night at 8 p.m. Friday or another show through April 13 at Kalita Humphreys Theater, 3636 Turtle Creek Blvd. Tickets start at $25 at
First Sunday of every month, 2 p.m.; First Thursday-Saturday of every month, 8 p.m. Starts: March 2. Continues through April 12, 2014
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Lauren Smart
Contact: Lauren Smart