Mommy, What Does Elves’ Blood Look Like?

Ho! Ho! Holy shit!!! A blood-covered elf and Santa wielding a chain saw! What the hell is happening? We are no more than a month and a half removed from Halloween, but that doesn’t mean the fright-inciting folks over at Moxley Manor have closed their doors for the season, not even close. They’ve instead decided to temporarily reopen for a holiday event called “A Nightscare Before Christmas.” I can only speculate on the slaughterous sights they will display. Rancorous reindeer dripping with type O? Mrs. Claus slow-cooking an elf carcass on a rotating spit? According to the promotion on Moxley Manor’s website, “A Nightscare Before Christmas will have all the screams that were heard throughout October, only now it is our Elves that have taken over Moxley Manor ...” Elves are the equivalence of half-sized holiday clowns. I hate clowns. I hate elves. They both scare me, but just to err on the side of heart attack, the Moxley elves will dementedly greet guests for the event. “A Nightscare Before Christmas” will happen this Saturday and on December 15 at Moxley Manor, 510 Harwood Road, Bedford. Admission is $13. The doors open at 7 p.m. and close at 9 p.m. Visit moxleymanor.com for reservations and more info.
Sat., Dec. 8, 2012
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Matthew Lawson
Contact: Matthew Lawson